please please please please please Jul 19, 2017 1:14:02 GMT -5
Post by Deleted on Jul 19, 2017 1:14:02 GMT -5
Sarah was a mess. Her head hurt from crying. Her chest hurt from crying. Her heart hurt from crying.
EVERYTHING HURT FROM CRYING.
And it was wholly her fault. She knew that. Kenzi knew that. And sitting in her hotel room in New York, she knew that there was nothing she could do about it.
Her red eyes stare blankly at the sleeping form of Angelica Vaughn. She had no idea how the two of them were sharing a room with a single bed. She had explicitly told her advocate, Sidney Grey, to make sure they had two rooms. But the bellman had insisted that they had been booked for the single room with the Queen bed. Any and all calls to Sidney could not get through, most likely due to that old, busted phone of hers that needed to be replaced. Sarah made sure that Ang was comfortable, made sure that her new friend was happy. Everything going on was not her fault, had nothing to do with her. She was simply a new friend, a newcomer to a company that Sarah herself had found to be cold and unwelcoming, who shared her passion for shopping and fashion. So after getting Ang settled, she had set to work on trying to find ANYONE who could help her.
Sarah had never been in a relationship before. Oh, she certainly had a sordid past. She had had her fair share of lovers. Katie Anderson, the woman she had entered into a menage-trois with a few days after she and Kenzi had started dating, had been lover number 27! That may not seem like a lot if you thought about long lives, but Sarah was only 19! And in all those lovers, she had never had a relationship, had never had an emotional connection with anyone. That was the thing that set Kenzi apart, of course, the thing that had helped Sarah realize that she was “mostly gay.” All of her lovers, including the four she had had in the calendar year before she entered into Team Kickass with Kenzi, had been merely physical releases and experiences. And now that she had fucked up beyond recourse with her? With the true love and light of her life? She had no clue what to do.
She tried Sidney first. Kenzi’s mother had been honest with her from the moment she met her. True, that honesty including the fact that she was utterly intolerant of her same-sex lifestyle with her daughter, but she appreciated that level of honesty. And their relationship had developed over the weeks, of course, as Sidney had taken a professional interest in her, had begun to advocate for her. But, as had been the case throughout the day, she was unavailable.
She tried Melissa Reeves next. Her first partner in the business and a dear friend of her Beloved, Mel was as no-nonsense as they come, offering Sarah “big sister” advice as well as a slap upside the head. Literally. Mel had beaten the fuck out of her on more than one occasion in the GrayFoote gym where she was a trainer. But Mel was busy with her own life and schedule, having had a match that night in Hollywood. Hollywood...where Sarah SHOULD have been at. She didn’t blame her, of course. Mel was doing Mel. Sarah SHOULD have been doing Team Kickass.
She tried Stacy Sterling, her “sister.” The delusional woman had blown her off consistently and constantly for the last month, even before the blowup between Team Kickass and her close circle. The woman had not even offered her a congratulations for her WrestleStock Cup victory! And, predictably, all she got was her inane bubbly answering matching where she and Adrien alternated words.
She was out of options. She was out of people she could talk to about the sensitive subject of lying to her secret fiance and breaking her heart. Out of people she could beg for advice on how to fix this.
She slipped out of the room and onto the balcony as she dialed one final number, a last resort. The phone number to the Canadian Fortress of Solitude of Nikita Dolore, her trainer and mentor, and the closest thing she had to a mother figure. Nikita knew all about broken hearts and hard relationships and had always had sound advice for her. She was the one that told her to slow down with Blasted Monk and not go on a European holiday with him a week after they started dating. She wished she had listened to her Sensei on that one, wished she had listened to her advice.
“please please please please please”
Her voice sounded frantic in her own ears. It sounded like her voice was as ready to croak and crack as much as her heart did. She had not spoken to Nikita since her father’s wake. She had been there for her, just like Kenzi had, both there to stroke her hair as he sobbed, both there to tell her it would be okay.
“please please please please please”
The phone rang as Sarah stared at the city lights below her penthouse balcony. Even through the receiver, the rings coming from Canada sounded as cold and desolate as she felt.
“PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE”
“You have reached-”
Sarah slams down the phone with a wordless scream into the Tri State air, a scream full of sorrow and regret for a crime she committed and could never take back. She falls to the floor of the balcony and weeps unabashedly, hot tears down her pale face, feeling as if her very soul was leaving her body.