Post by Deleted on Dec 16, 2017 22:04:47 GMT -5
I honestly didn’t think I’d be here in this position again, but I am. A culmination of a lot of things that have happened over the past few months has lead me here again. It all started when Destiny and Twain Cornett passed away, then with all the Hell that Sylvia Lopez put me through, losing two people who I considered best friends and not to mention, my biological father coming back into my life after twenty-eight years, only to run off again, all of it has taken its toll on me.
And I’d be lying if I didn’t say that the amount of pressure that I continue to put on myself to achieve what I want to achieve in the wrestling business is also part of why I’m feeling this way too. Not only that, but as a member of the Boardwalk Angels and being the only member without a championship, I kind of feel inferior to my fellow Angels as well.
Which is why I need to do something about it…
I’m here outside of Dr Shields’ office, dressed in a pair of black leather boots, a pair of skin tight black leather trousers, my black “Unbreakable Angel” T-shirt and my custom black leather jacket.
Taking a deep breath in, I knock a couple of times on the door before entering the room to find Dr Shields sitting down behind his desk looking over some paperwork. Once he notices me, he stands to his feet as I close the door behind me.
“Good morning, Miss Jones, it’s a pleasure to meet you.”
Turning to face him, I walk up to the desk as he extends his arm which I take for a handshake.
“Thank you for seeing me, Dr Shields. And please, call me Stacy.”
“As you wish, Stacy…”
He motions to the black leather sofa beside his desk.
“...please, lie down on the sofa and we’ll get started, shall we?”
I nod before sitting down on the sofa before swinging my legs up onto it so I’m in a lying position with my back and resting against the arm of it.
“So then, what can I help you with?”
Taking a deep breath, I clasp my hands together and begin to twiddle my thumbs.
“Well, long story short, doc...I’ve been having suicidal thoughts again.”
I hear him ruffling some papers.
“I see. Yes, looking through the notes I received from Dr Li, I can see that you have a history of that. Tell me, Stacy...when did these thoughts begin?”
“Earlier this month...but I think these thoughts have been wanting to break free for quite a few months now.”
He clears his throat and leans back in his chair.
“Okay. And do you have any idea what has caused you to have these thoughts again?”
I glance over to him as he looks back at me, the concern on my face must be clear as day to him.
“I believe it started when my friends, Destiny and Twain Cornett passed away. Not necessarily their deaths, I mean, of course their deaths affected me greatly, but the means of how it happened. At first I was led to believe that Twain died in a hurricane and Destiny was beaten to death. But then later, it was revealed that they were both murdered by people who were trying to get to their sister and one of my best friends, Jamilyn Cornett.”
He nods as he takes notes.
“That’s certainly a tragic revelation to discover. Losing anyone you’re close too is always tough, despite it being a natural part of life, but to discover their lives were taken by someone else makes it even worse.”
I nod in agreement as I begin to feel emotional and Dr Shields hands me a box of tissues.
“A-And that on top of two people I considered best friends turning into horrible people, the torment I suffered for months at the hands of an old nemesis, Sylvia Lopez. And also, after twenty-eight years, my biological father came back into my life, only to run off and abandon me after we started to build a father/daughter relationship.”
Bursting into tears now, I remove some of the tissues and wipe my tears away.
“Tell me more about your father.”
I swiftly turn my attention to him, almost glaring at him in anger.
“He’s not my father! My father was the man who raised me and saved my life by getting me into wrestling.”
He remains calm as he leans forward, resting his arms on his desk.
“My apologies, Stacy. I didn’t mean to upset you, remember, I’m here to help you get through this troubling time.”
I nod, I didn’t mean to snap at him like that, but after what that bastard did to me? I don’t even want to acknowledge his existence.
“I also think that I’m putting too much pressure on myself in my wrestling career.”
“Oh?”
“Yeah. I’m working for two wrestling companies right now and I’ve been wrestling professionally for nearly a decade and I’ve never held a World Championship. It’s a dream I’ve had ever since I started training at the age of fourteen, and it was also the dream my father had for me.”
Nodding, he scribbles down some more notes.
“And...I also feel kind of inferior in one of the companies I work for, Ladies All-Star Wrestling.”
“Why do you feel inferior there?”
“Because I’m part of a group called the Boardwalk Angels that includes my friends, Zoey Madigan-Star, who you know already, Farrah Cornett who you may have heard about as she’s Zoey’s closest friend, and Crystal Hilton. And all three of them are champions and I’m not.”
“I see…”
Leaning back in his chair again, he crosses his right leg over his left.
“Well, Stacy. It’s good that you’re opening up about these things, I’m sure you already know from your previous sessions with Dr Li that opening up about what is troubling you is the first step towards recovery.”
Sitting up properly now, I turn to face him.
“Now, when it comes to the deaths of your friends and the friends who turned out to not be the people you thought they were, the pain of those things will pass over time. I know from my sessions with Zoey that you have a large, strong, loving friend base and they will help you get through these difficult times.”
I nod as I continue to fiddle with my thumbs.
“As for the issues with Sylvia and your biological father, if possible, you need to confront them for closure…”
I stare at him with a look that probably tells him that that’s never going to happen in a million years.
“However, judging from the look on your face, that isn’t going to be possible so in that case, you should do your best to forget about them and focus on the people in your life who do care about you.”
Nodding again, he gives me a reassuring smile.
“And as it pertains to your wrestling career, I know how passionate you are about it and how badly you want to achieve your dream. But you need to take a step back and understand that you’re still young and you hopefully have many years ahead of you in your wrestling career. Just try and focus on your career in the here and now and try not to think too far ahead.”
“I’ll try…”
Smiling, he puts his pen down and checks his watch.
“Okay, Stacy, times up and I feel like we’ve made some substantial progress. I’d like you to try and do the things I’ve suggested and I’ll contact you to make another appointment if you’re okay to do that?”
“Yes, that’s fine with me. Thank you, Doctor.”
I stand to my feet, as does Dr Shields and we share another handshake before I make my way towards the door to his office and leave.
I’m feeling much better after seeing Dr Shields, and as it pertains to my wrestling career, he’s right. I need to focus on the here and now rather than my future.
And the here and now for me, is the Battle Royal.
After my session with Dr Shields, I’ve already started to feel somewhat better about a lot of things, but I know how long this road is and it’s certainly not over by a long shot. I want to make sure that I get this sorted out as soon as possible, because I don’t want to lose my children again, nor do I want to lose Jennifer or any of my friends.
I need to remain focused on getting my life back on track, but at the same time, I also need to remain focused on my wrestling career too, and the next destination in that journey is LAW #73 and the Battle Royal to determine the new number one contender for the Marquee Championship.
I need to make this one count.
The camera flickers to life and I can be seen outside, walking along a beach here in Florida. I’m dressed in a long black dress and a large black hat as my bare feet trail across the warm, soft sand as the sound of waves crashing can be heard in the background.
There’s something so calm and peaceful about the ocean, despite it being a place full of dangerous creatures and the carcasses of ships that played victim to the viciousness of the unforgiving bed of water.
Kind of reminds me of myself in a way.
“The ocean is something that is calm and pleasant most of the time. It’s something that people can have fun with, laugh with. Something that makes people smile…”
The expression on my face turns serious now as I glare into the camera.
“But other times, it’s something that is angry and feared! Something that can tear into people and make them scream in pain! Just...like...me…”
I grin slightly.
“You see, ladies...most of you who are joining me in this match, I have a serious problem with! Whether it’s because of something you’ve said to me or my friends, or something you have done to me or my friends. And that does not bode well for any of you, and that also includes the two women involved in this match that I don’t have any issues with too!”
Continuing to walk along the beach, a light wind blows my long black hair backwards.
“It’s like something snapped in my brain at Night of Glory when Samantha used underhanded tactics to defeat me. I’m done coming in second place! I’m done coming so damn close to beating the big stars here in LAW but just coming up short in the end! It’s time that I grab the bull by its horns and I do what I KNOW that I can do here and that is be one of the best!”
I chuckle a little.
“I’m not Kayla Winters, who believes herself to be better than every single member of the LAW roster, who apparently gets paid more than all of us combined just by sitting on her ass doing nothing! I’m not Etsuko Mitsuzaka who follows a false God and does everything that false God tells her to do! I’m not Milisandre Crowthorne who doesn’t even want to be in this match or care about winning it! I’m not Maria Spencer who is trying to ‘cleanse’ LAW by turning it into her own personal playground! I’m not Samantha Tolson who has decided to take shortcuts to win matches instead of putting in hard work to achieve her goals! I’m not Roxy Cotton who believes she’s the greatest fucking thing to ever exist! And Hell, I’m not even Nova Sinclair despite how similar we are when it comes to doing things the right way!”
Shaking my head now, I take a deep breath.
“I’ll tell you all who I am! I’m the first one to arrive at the gym and the last one to leave! I’m the hardest working, most determined woman in this company! I’m the woman who has held gold in EVERY single company I’ve ever worked for bar this one! I’m the woman who gives everyone who is a fan of me the belief in their hearts to be who they want to be! I’m the woman who believes that the only way you can truly call yourself a winner and a champion is if you work your ass off every single day and achieve your goals all by yourself without help! I believe in doing things the right way, not taking the easy road!”
I switch from holding the camera with my left hand to holding it with my right.
“I am Stacy fucking Jones! And I don’t care whether you’re my friend or my enemy, if you’re in my way, I’m going to fight my way through you to get to the top of the mountain! And at LAW #73, Maria, Etsuko, Samantha, Nova, Kayla, Roxy and Milisandre? All of you are going over that top rope! All of you are getting eliminated and it will be MY NAME that the announcer will say is the winner of the match and new number one contender for the Marquee Championship! So you better all get ready because you’re ALL going to suffer my Judgement! Your Final Penance...is coming!”
And with that, I switch the camera off, causing it to cut to black.
This time, I’m going to make sure that I live up to my words and win this Battle Royal. I’m going to make sure that I head into the new year as the number one contender for the Marquee Championship!
And I hope my friend and current Marquee Champion, Crystal Hilton watches this match, because once I win it, my next plan is to take that championship from her!
Because like I said. Friend or foe? I’m going through them to get to the top!
And I’d be lying if I didn’t say that the amount of pressure that I continue to put on myself to achieve what I want to achieve in the wrestling business is also part of why I’m feeling this way too. Not only that, but as a member of the Boardwalk Angels and being the only member without a championship, I kind of feel inferior to my fellow Angels as well.
Which is why I need to do something about it…
I’m here outside of Dr Shields’ office, dressed in a pair of black leather boots, a pair of skin tight black leather trousers, my black “Unbreakable Angel” T-shirt and my custom black leather jacket.
Taking a deep breath in, I knock a couple of times on the door before entering the room to find Dr Shields sitting down behind his desk looking over some paperwork. Once he notices me, he stands to his feet as I close the door behind me.
“Good morning, Miss Jones, it’s a pleasure to meet you.”
Turning to face him, I walk up to the desk as he extends his arm which I take for a handshake.
“Thank you for seeing me, Dr Shields. And please, call me Stacy.”
“As you wish, Stacy…”
He motions to the black leather sofa beside his desk.
“...please, lie down on the sofa and we’ll get started, shall we?”
I nod before sitting down on the sofa before swinging my legs up onto it so I’m in a lying position with my back and resting against the arm of it.
“So then, what can I help you with?”
Taking a deep breath, I clasp my hands together and begin to twiddle my thumbs.
“Well, long story short, doc...I’ve been having suicidal thoughts again.”
I hear him ruffling some papers.
“I see. Yes, looking through the notes I received from Dr Li, I can see that you have a history of that. Tell me, Stacy...when did these thoughts begin?”
“Earlier this month...but I think these thoughts have been wanting to break free for quite a few months now.”
He clears his throat and leans back in his chair.
“Okay. And do you have any idea what has caused you to have these thoughts again?”
I glance over to him as he looks back at me, the concern on my face must be clear as day to him.
“I believe it started when my friends, Destiny and Twain Cornett passed away. Not necessarily their deaths, I mean, of course their deaths affected me greatly, but the means of how it happened. At first I was led to believe that Twain died in a hurricane and Destiny was beaten to death. But then later, it was revealed that they were both murdered by people who were trying to get to their sister and one of my best friends, Jamilyn Cornett.”
He nods as he takes notes.
“That’s certainly a tragic revelation to discover. Losing anyone you’re close too is always tough, despite it being a natural part of life, but to discover their lives were taken by someone else makes it even worse.”
I nod in agreement as I begin to feel emotional and Dr Shields hands me a box of tissues.
“A-And that on top of two people I considered best friends turning into horrible people, the torment I suffered for months at the hands of an old nemesis, Sylvia Lopez. And also, after twenty-eight years, my biological father came back into my life, only to run off and abandon me after we started to build a father/daughter relationship.”
Bursting into tears now, I remove some of the tissues and wipe my tears away.
“Tell me more about your father.”
I swiftly turn my attention to him, almost glaring at him in anger.
“He’s not my father! My father was the man who raised me and saved my life by getting me into wrestling.”
He remains calm as he leans forward, resting his arms on his desk.
“My apologies, Stacy. I didn’t mean to upset you, remember, I’m here to help you get through this troubling time.”
I nod, I didn’t mean to snap at him like that, but after what that bastard did to me? I don’t even want to acknowledge his existence.
“I also think that I’m putting too much pressure on myself in my wrestling career.”
“Oh?”
“Yeah. I’m working for two wrestling companies right now and I’ve been wrestling professionally for nearly a decade and I’ve never held a World Championship. It’s a dream I’ve had ever since I started training at the age of fourteen, and it was also the dream my father had for me.”
Nodding, he scribbles down some more notes.
“And...I also feel kind of inferior in one of the companies I work for, Ladies All-Star Wrestling.”
“Why do you feel inferior there?”
“Because I’m part of a group called the Boardwalk Angels that includes my friends, Zoey Madigan-Star, who you know already, Farrah Cornett who you may have heard about as she’s Zoey’s closest friend, and Crystal Hilton. And all three of them are champions and I’m not.”
“I see…”
Leaning back in his chair again, he crosses his right leg over his left.
“Well, Stacy. It’s good that you’re opening up about these things, I’m sure you already know from your previous sessions with Dr Li that opening up about what is troubling you is the first step towards recovery.”
Sitting up properly now, I turn to face him.
“Now, when it comes to the deaths of your friends and the friends who turned out to not be the people you thought they were, the pain of those things will pass over time. I know from my sessions with Zoey that you have a large, strong, loving friend base and they will help you get through these difficult times.”
I nod as I continue to fiddle with my thumbs.
“As for the issues with Sylvia and your biological father, if possible, you need to confront them for closure…”
I stare at him with a look that probably tells him that that’s never going to happen in a million years.
“However, judging from the look on your face, that isn’t going to be possible so in that case, you should do your best to forget about them and focus on the people in your life who do care about you.”
Nodding again, he gives me a reassuring smile.
“And as it pertains to your wrestling career, I know how passionate you are about it and how badly you want to achieve your dream. But you need to take a step back and understand that you’re still young and you hopefully have many years ahead of you in your wrestling career. Just try and focus on your career in the here and now and try not to think too far ahead.”
“I’ll try…”
Smiling, he puts his pen down and checks his watch.
“Okay, Stacy, times up and I feel like we’ve made some substantial progress. I’d like you to try and do the things I’ve suggested and I’ll contact you to make another appointment if you’re okay to do that?”
“Yes, that’s fine with me. Thank you, Doctor.”
I stand to my feet, as does Dr Shields and we share another handshake before I make my way towards the door to his office and leave.
I’m feeling much better after seeing Dr Shields, and as it pertains to my wrestling career, he’s right. I need to focus on the here and now rather than my future.
And the here and now for me, is the Battle Royal.
After my session with Dr Shields, I’ve already started to feel somewhat better about a lot of things, but I know how long this road is and it’s certainly not over by a long shot. I want to make sure that I get this sorted out as soon as possible, because I don’t want to lose my children again, nor do I want to lose Jennifer or any of my friends.
I need to remain focused on getting my life back on track, but at the same time, I also need to remain focused on my wrestling career too, and the next destination in that journey is LAW #73 and the Battle Royal to determine the new number one contender for the Marquee Championship.
I need to make this one count.
The camera flickers to life and I can be seen outside, walking along a beach here in Florida. I’m dressed in a long black dress and a large black hat as my bare feet trail across the warm, soft sand as the sound of waves crashing can be heard in the background.
There’s something so calm and peaceful about the ocean, despite it being a place full of dangerous creatures and the carcasses of ships that played victim to the viciousness of the unforgiving bed of water.
Kind of reminds me of myself in a way.
“The ocean is something that is calm and pleasant most of the time. It’s something that people can have fun with, laugh with. Something that makes people smile…”
The expression on my face turns serious now as I glare into the camera.
“But other times, it’s something that is angry and feared! Something that can tear into people and make them scream in pain! Just...like...me…”
I grin slightly.
“You see, ladies...most of you who are joining me in this match, I have a serious problem with! Whether it’s because of something you’ve said to me or my friends, or something you have done to me or my friends. And that does not bode well for any of you, and that also includes the two women involved in this match that I don’t have any issues with too!”
Continuing to walk along the beach, a light wind blows my long black hair backwards.
“It’s like something snapped in my brain at Night of Glory when Samantha used underhanded tactics to defeat me. I’m done coming in second place! I’m done coming so damn close to beating the big stars here in LAW but just coming up short in the end! It’s time that I grab the bull by its horns and I do what I KNOW that I can do here and that is be one of the best!”
I chuckle a little.
“I’m not Kayla Winters, who believes herself to be better than every single member of the LAW roster, who apparently gets paid more than all of us combined just by sitting on her ass doing nothing! I’m not Etsuko Mitsuzaka who follows a false God and does everything that false God tells her to do! I’m not Milisandre Crowthorne who doesn’t even want to be in this match or care about winning it! I’m not Maria Spencer who is trying to ‘cleanse’ LAW by turning it into her own personal playground! I’m not Samantha Tolson who has decided to take shortcuts to win matches instead of putting in hard work to achieve her goals! I’m not Roxy Cotton who believes she’s the greatest fucking thing to ever exist! And Hell, I’m not even Nova Sinclair despite how similar we are when it comes to doing things the right way!”
Shaking my head now, I take a deep breath.
“I’ll tell you all who I am! I’m the first one to arrive at the gym and the last one to leave! I’m the hardest working, most determined woman in this company! I’m the woman who has held gold in EVERY single company I’ve ever worked for bar this one! I’m the woman who gives everyone who is a fan of me the belief in their hearts to be who they want to be! I’m the woman who believes that the only way you can truly call yourself a winner and a champion is if you work your ass off every single day and achieve your goals all by yourself without help! I believe in doing things the right way, not taking the easy road!”
I switch from holding the camera with my left hand to holding it with my right.
“I am Stacy fucking Jones! And I don’t care whether you’re my friend or my enemy, if you’re in my way, I’m going to fight my way through you to get to the top of the mountain! And at LAW #73, Maria, Etsuko, Samantha, Nova, Kayla, Roxy and Milisandre? All of you are going over that top rope! All of you are getting eliminated and it will be MY NAME that the announcer will say is the winner of the match and new number one contender for the Marquee Championship! So you better all get ready because you’re ALL going to suffer my Judgement! Your Final Penance...is coming!”
And with that, I switch the camera off, causing it to cut to black.
This time, I’m going to make sure that I live up to my words and win this Battle Royal. I’m going to make sure that I head into the new year as the number one contender for the Marquee Championship!
And I hope my friend and current Marquee Champion, Crystal Hilton watches this match, because once I win it, my next plan is to take that championship from her!
Because like I said. Friend or foe? I’m going through them to get to the top!