Post by Kenzi Grey on Jun 25, 2016 22:30:15 GMT -5
This roleplay contains some explicit themes...most of which takes place through direct messaging. If you have followed any portion of these character's lives over social media...the elements below will complete the picture of what you all saw play out over the past week. The language and some elements were toned down for the purpose of posting...but caution is still strongly advised...
14 June 2016
LOS ANGELES, CA
Kenzi had been completely out of sorts since her run in with Jamilyn Cornett the week before. She had gone to see the woman and take the measure of her since Alex Yin and damn near every other woman she knew was either sleeping with her or talking about sleeping with her. Kenzi had intended to find out what she had over her ex…but instead of getting answers…she ended up getting put under the woman’s spell.
She had hoped to seduce the diminutive vixen, but instead, she ended up at the woman’s mercy. She couldn’t explain it…but it had come over her like a tidal wave and before she knew it, she was the one that was nearly at the woman’s mercy. She had barely been able to escape the woman’s house without surrendering herself to her…but with an effort worthy of a saint, she had managed to do so…
…or so she thought…
Her mind had replayed their meeting over and over inside her head. She couldn’t get the thought of her out of her own mind. What was happening to her? What power did this woman hold over her…and why did she find it so intoxicating? She needed to be focusing on her match…not on the woman that was seducing her ex-fiancée…the one that had nearly seduced her. The Queen of the Ring is what mattered…facing Mindy De Santiago…the rest could wait…
BUZZ-BUZZ
Kenzi picked up her phone and stared at the screen, her heart skipping as she realized that it was from Jamilyn Cornett. She knew that she should have tossed the phone away or just deleted the message without even looking at it, but she couldn’t help herself…
And so it had begun, then and there...my conversations with Jamilyn Cornett. I should have been training and readying myself to face Mindy on Sunday night at LAW 49, but I was too busy flirting over social media with the girlfriend of the woman that wanted to beat the living hell out of me. I knew it was wrong and that is why I fought so hard to resist...but every time she would DM me...things got deeper and deeper between us.
I didn't want to hurt Alexis Blake...at least not like that. I had my limits. I would do to her, what had been done to me. I had no intention of carrying on with her girlfriend. Our little kissing match at Jamilyn's house had been a one and done...I had put it behind me, as best I could...never to revisit it again...but...things done in the dark have a strange way of being brought into the light...
15 June 2016
LOS ANGLES, CA
After Alexis had savagely ripped me a new ass over Twitter...Jamilyn had managed to smooth things over. I have no idea what she said or what she did, but I was grateful. I wanted to put that episode behind me...but there would be no such luck. Jamilyn had her sights on me...and whether I wanted to resist or not...she wasn't taking no for an answer...
16 June 2016
LOS ANGLES, CA
That girl was Christina Hall...or Tina for short. I had been staying with her while I tried to keep it together...but there was just one problem...Tina was a half insane recovering addict and alcoholic. She was the perfect foil for where I was in life. She enabled all of my bad habits and I enabled hers. I began drinking in earnest...and acting out in the very worst of ways.
To Tina's credit, she tried to clean up for me...she quit...well...after she damn near died of alcohol poisoning...which was largely my fault. She ended up in the hospital and I was running the streets like a mad woman...drunk off my ass and pissing off everyone I encountered. It wasn't until the next morning that I realized how out of control I had been...
17 June 2018
LOS ANGELES, CA
I was smart not to answer her question about what I really wanted...because the answer was most certainly her. I didn't need to be encouraging her...I needed to be putting her out of my mind. I tried my best...but my best sucked ass! I followed her relentlessly on social media...stalking her from afar. It could have ended there...but no...my dumb ass had to go and make mention of her referring to her HOES as her 'HERD.' Frankly, it was none of my business...but I opened my big fat mouth...and just like that...Jamilyn Cornett came busting right back into my life...
...admittedly, just like I wanted her to...
There I go...I said it again...like a fucking dumb ass! "But I want to be..." What I goddamn moron I am! Yeah...I wanted Jamilyn...but at the same time, I didn't want her. She lived a lifestyle that wasn't at all for me. I don't do poly...not now...and not ever! Even for her. She was driving me up the wall...and by this time, so was Tina.
To her credit, Tina was doing what she could to recover...but all I wanted to do was get wasted and forget the world. I drank more and more...and like always...it was like a siren call to Jamilyn...she always knew...always found me...
I was strong and I ignored her. I felt strong for once...I was saying no to crack! Crack was whack! Who was I kidding? I was not escaping my addiction that easily. Several more angry tweets from Alexis Blake keyed me in to things that were going on in the Cornett household...just as much strife as I was trying to avoid with Tina...
Alexis had obviously been reading my texts with Jamilyn...and she was none too fucking happy. As for me...I was none to happy about that shit either!
That was the straw that broke the camel's back! She was going her way and I was going mine. At least...that is what I thought was happening. While I was trying my best to work out things with a very pissed off Tina...Jamilyn was trying to figure things out as well...but not with Alexis...
Sidney Grey, her head covered by a large floppy hat, sat on the sunbathed deck of the exclusive restaurant that she had selected as the meeting place for her and her guest, a woman that had expressed a desire to meet her over the welfare of her wayward daughter. Ordinarily, she would have ignored the woman completely, but for some reason, she was the only one whose concern seemed genuine enough to entertain. She didn’t care for it…but things with Kenzi were getting way out of hand and she was getting desperate.
Sidney picked up her afternoon cocktail and sipped at it as she eyed the woman being escorted to her table. She cut her eyes over to the O’Connell’s a few tables over, likely still fuming over their tag team loss to the woman and her partner…but this wasn’t a wrestling match and they were itching for the woman to overstep her bounds and give them a chance to wail on her. She gestured for them to remain seated as Jamilyn was brought to her table and their uncomfortable meeting of the minds began.
Sid was the first to speak as she gave a smirk, “Forgive me for not standing…” she gestured to her wheelchair, “…I already have my seat…so why don’t you take one…and I’d rather not dilly dally…this is about my daughter, plain and simple, nothing else!” Sid watched her like a hawk, wanting nothing more than for this meeting to be quick and to the point.
Jamilyn nodded, taking her seat simply. "I have no judgments about your seating arrangements, Miss Grey. I've grown concerned about Mackenzie in recent times. Her increasingly destructive behavior, her constant mood swings...her different behavior with me than everyone else, including...Colin." Jamilyn chose her wording carefully, unsure what Sidney knew of Tina or herself. "Though I myself can't personally be involved anymore, I at least need to know why she's so different around me than she is everyone else. And as much as you remind me of my own mother...and not in a positive light...since Mackenzie won't tell me anything, you're the only one that can give me any sort of answers as to why she seems like I would have been without the support I had from my family."
Sid regarded Jamilyn carefully, taking in her words and watching her mannerisms. It was obvious that she was concerned about Kenzi…but there was something more there as well. She didn’t care for it, but these were fast becoming desperate times. Sid dismissed her comments about being compared to Jamilyn’s mother. It truly didn’t matter to her. “Do you REALLY think I intend to tell you my daughter’s deepest and darkest secrets…knowing that you’ll just spread it all over the place with impunity? I saw you’re social media exchange with Kenzi earlier…and while I can’t guess what was said, the fact that you could just share her private thoughts with other people…disturbs me!”
Sid sighed, “I agreed to this meeting when I thought you cared about my daughter more than you cared about the wetness of your overly used crotch…but now I’m starting to see things differently!” She sipped at her drink, her eyes still on Jamilyn. As she put it back down, she framed her words carefully, “The only reason I am still willing to talk to you is because regardless of how I feel about your shitty attitude and lifestyle…you’re the only one who hasn’t driven her to slitting her wrists…yet! That means she values what you say…even if what you say is complete garbage!”
Sid reached into her bag and pulled out a document, sliding it over to her as she gestured for Dana to come to her side. “That is a non-disclosure agreement…” she gestured to Dana, “…and this is our witness. If you want to talk about Kenzi…it will be under these terms…ONLY!” Sid sat back, lacing her fingers, “My daughter has a career to protect…and I don’t need you flapping lips ruining it!” She smirked, “The ones on your face…not the ones between your legs!”
Jamilyn nodded. Time to put her cards on the table. "Your daughter won't admit she's in love with me, Sidney." Jamilyn leaned back in her chair. "She's told me everything she wants to do to me...in every detail imaginable. But because of your hatred for homosexual relationships, she's too frightened to be herself. She's a beautiful and intelligent girl, and if she would--"
Jamilyn could see Dana's face snarl as she talked. She frowned, but redirected the conversation. "I will not deny being in love with her myself, Miss Grey. My only reason for not pursuing it any further is at your own daughter's insistence that I not do so. That being said, considering that the last time Mackenzie and I had an exchange things didn't exactly go over so well with one of my closer girlfriends, I was not about to risk her being angry with me. Mackenzie refuses to even consider me as an option...so I did what I thought was right. I figure you of all people would understand that. If I could go back and change things, I would. I do care romantically about your daughter, Miss Grey. I can't help that I do. I am in love with Mackenzie, I hate that Tina's enabling her like hell, if Mackenzie would just tell me the truth I'd dump everyone else I'm with to be with her....and I know by saying that, I've just pissed you off, and I think I'm okay with that. But regardless of what we think about each other, at least give me credit for laying myself out there so you know exactly what I think of her with no fear of repercussions. And you know I'm telling the truth, because if I didn't care about your daughter, I wouldn't even be here right now daring to say any of this to your face."
Jami picks up the pen and opens it, looking over the language of the contract as she studies it, hoping that (A) she didn't overreach her boundaries with Sidney, and (B) she hasn't shot herself in the foot before she's even had a chance to hear Sidney out.
Sid drummed her fingernails rhythmically on the table as she stared at Jamilyn, still reading over the NDA that would inflict heavy penalties for public disclosure of any kind concerning their discussions. While she continued to mull it over, Sid addressed her earlier comments. “You think that I dislike all lesbians…but I don’t…I dislike predators like you and like Alex Yin…probably that drug addled buffoon Tina Hall as well! I dislike you because this isn’t just a lifestyle…it’s your way to control people…specifically the women in your lives. You think I know nothing of it because I’m not a lesbian…but you’re wrong…I know what you are because you’re no different than all of the drooling men that jump from bed to bed sticking your prick in any willing snatch that will have it! They control weak women that way…keep them under thumb until someone better comes along…” she shook her head, “…or if you have a talented enough tongue, you manage to keep them both!”
Sid signaled for another drink and ordered one for Jamilyn, not bothering to ask her what she wanted or if she wanted anything at all. “You claim to love my daughter and while I doubt that…while I really hope that’s not the case…I know for a fact that she probably does love you…” Sid chuckled, the let out a long sigh.
“For fucks sake, just sign the damn NDA so we can clear the air…unless you think I have some clause in there about forcing you to eat me out!” She slapped her hand on the table, “While we’re young…or at least still breathing!”
Jamilyn smiled at the idea of falling "Sidney...I just gave up all my other girlfriends...to even have a chance with Mackenzie." Jamilyn said as she signed the agreement. "I'm willing to make that kind of sacrifice for her. And if I was such a predator, I wouldn't be making sure she was safe and sound every chance I got. When she tried to drown herself after that fight with Lexi, I checked on Mackenzie, not Alexis, and Bobbi is my witness to that. You have my silence; nothing we discuss will leave this table."
Sid grabbed the document and looked it over, then slid it to Dana, who quickly signed it as a witness. Sid waved for Dana to leave them and she dutifully did, but not before giving Jamilyn the stink eye. With the paperwork out of the way, Sid dropped all pretenses. “My daughter is a very sick girl…not sick physically…but mentally. She always has been…from the moment I birthed her I knew something was off.” She lowered her head, “I drank…I did drugs…I didn’t care about anything while I carried her. The only reason I didn’t abort her was because of her father…”
Sid realized that she said too much on that count. Kenzi had no idea that her mother knew exactly who her father was, and what was more, he was alive and kicking. She quickly moved on, not wanting to further complicate things with this little tidbit of information. “Kenzi was a terrible child…just as I was a terrible mother. I couldn’t raise her…so I left her to my mother…I pretended that she wasn’t even mine. She was a vicious and brutish little monster…too much for even my mother to handle on a regular basis.” Sid paused, pulling out a cigarette and lighting up, ignoring the ‘no smoking’ signs.
She took a long drag…composing herself before exhaling, “Kenzi fought…she hurt other children…she hurt them badly, to the point where she was forced into home schooling for a time. She broke things…she set fire to my mother’s house…four times. The last time she nearly burned her to death in her own bedroom.” Sid chuckled a bit, “Probably would have served her right.” She flicked away the ashes, “When she was 12, she was diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder. My mother nearly lost custody of her to the state…but she convinced me that we could salvage her…so…I tried my hand on being a real mother again. With a mixture of medications and techniques I learned to stabilize her moods…she began to improve. We thought the worst was over…until my career pulled me away again.”
Sid puffed away, trying to remember it all, “Kenzi got worse and worse…she severely injured a young boy in the neighborhood…beat him with a bat…she said that he was seeing other girls.” She snickered, but it was hollow, “She had met the boy only a few hours earlier.”
Sid finished and started to light another one. “I came back after a health scare…before that moment, I had every intention of letting her rot away in an institution…but I didn’t I brought her back…I again. I held her together…and she started to grow and flourish! Then…the accident happened…and Kenzi has slowly gotten worse. To be perfectly honest with you, I think that Alex Yin was lucky to have gotten on as well as she did…given Ken’s deteriorating state. She’s lucky that Hannah was the only causality. At least she was locked away in the relative safety of jail!”
Sid continued smoking and drinking, “So…now you come to me to tell me that you love my daughter…and I tell you in turn that she probably loves you as well…but it’s nothing like you think it will be. She’s dangerous…to herself…to the people you care about. Without me to keep her in check…she will hurt herself…or she’ll hurt you or someone else, given time. I need you to bring her home…so that I can help her before she’s too far gone…before she loses everything…before you lose everything…”
Jamilyn took all this information in. It made sense...except... "With all due respect, Miss Grey...Mackenzie doesn't seem near as out of control when she's around me compared to most people. When it's her and I alone, she's more rational, calmer...she doesn't overreact as quickly. She seems scared to open up to me because of Alex and Tina....but I know she desires to open up to me. It's just that when everyone else gets in the way, she starts flipping out again. I think...I might be able to help her too. Please...at least let me try...so you're not the only one who has this burden. I promise, I won't enable her, Miss Grey...if anything, I can be the woman who loves her enough to protect her and keep her safe. Far as I'm concerned, she can lose her shit on Alexis all she wants....but with your blessing...I at least want to be there for her when you can't be."
Sid considered what Jamilyn was offering, then crushed out the cigarette on the table, “A partnership then…you keep her out of trouble when I am unable to.” She eyed Jamilyn, then pointed at her, “I love my daughter, regardless of what she’s done and what you say. Believe me when I tell you this…when you hurt her…and I know that you will, you’ll answer to me…and to all of my girls…do you understand?”
Despite the fact that she asked a question, she didn’t bother to stick around for the answer. Instead, she signaled for the O’Connell’s to come over and they promptly gave Jamilyn the finger, then proceeded to wheel Sidney Grey out of the restaurant, leaving her with the check.
Fortunately for me...I had not be privy to that conversation...but I would be...soon enough. Instead filling my head with knowledge about other people, I was filling my gut with what was left of Tina's booze. I got ripped to the gills and I left the house...tweeting to world about how drunk I was as I drove Tina's car...
YOLO
I drove her car right into a fire hydrant.
UH OH
I was a complete mess...but at least I had a guardian angel to watch over me...
LATER THAT NIGHT
Jami pulls up to the car and leans out to talk to Kenzi. “Mackenzie, are you okay?”
Ken drunkenly staggers over and falls against the side of the car, trying to look sexy, but failing. “My hero...but I imagined you more naked...” Ken falls to the ground in a heap on the pavement.
Jami steps out in a tight black leather miniskirt, a purple tube top, and silver heels. “Come on, honey...do you know what city you're in?” She tries to answer, then pukes everywhere. She heaves violently, unable to breathe as she struggles against her convulsions. Jami rubs her back and soothes her. “It's okay, Caramel. I'll get you someplace safe. Come on...you can puke all you want in my car...it's a rental, it's had worse happen to it.”
Jami sees a couple of tweets from Dani Chow on her phone. “Your mom's lawyer....who do you feel safer with, honey...me or them? Where are they right now, anyway?” Kenzi can only shake her head before she seemingly passes out. Jami carries Kenzi to her car and buckles her up.
(HALF AN HOUR LATER)
Jami carries Kenzi into her place and to one of the guest rooms. She lays Kenzi down and sits on the bed with her. “Mackenzie...this is all my fault...I'm so sorry, sweetie...” She caresses Kenzi's face. “I'm not leaving your side, honey....not until you're awake and feeling better.” Kenzi doesn't move, just doses quietly.
Against her better instinct, Jami leans down and kisses Kenzi's lips gently. “I love you, Mackenzie...please...forgive me for what happened earlier today...at least now you don't have to worry about being jealous of Alexis anymore...”
(EARLY TUESDAY MORNING)
True to her word, Jami has not left Kenzi's side while she was passed out. In fact, she's not even been to sleep herself. She's still sitting on the bed with Kenzi, stroking her hair and face, having not changed from her clothes and only having left for the bathroom and the occasional food or drink item, in this case a caramel blended coffee.
Kenzi awoke, instantly feeling ashamed for her actions, despite not remembering most of what happened. She knew it had been shameful, all the same. She was a mess and felt filthy...and the embarrassment from that made her what to disappear. Seeing Jamilyn there, beside her, holding her hand...likely through the night made her feel like cutting her own throat. She must have seemed like the world's biggest tool at the moment. Kenzi sat up...looking Jamilyn in the eye, then she scrambled off the bed, grabbing her bag as she bolted to what she hoped was the bathroom, slamming to door and locking it behind her. She couldn't face her...not like this.
Jami sighed and knocked on the door. “Mackenzie...you're in my cosplay closet...please, come out. We need to talk...”
Kenzi looked around and saw all the costumes, then felt like a bigger idiot. She wanted to come out and talk face to face, but embarrassment held her in place. It seemed juvenile to text...but it felt safer…
Jami understood to a degree and replied back, making sure to be as sweet as she could. She wanted to talk to Kenzi face to face as well...
Kenzi appreciated that, though a part of her was slightly disappointed that more hadn't happened. At that moment her thoughts turned to Tina, and what she must be thinking right now.
As Jami saw her text about coming out of the closet, she didn't do the standard joke that everyone else was expecting....rather, she meant to encourage her by offering some of her cosplays to help Kenzi feel more at home.
Kenzi came out, looking like a whipped puppy. “Sorry...this isn't what I wanted. I just got out of control...” She started to go to Jamilyn and put her arms around her, but thoughts of Tina kept her from doing that. “Could you just take me home?”
Jami walked up to her and up her arms around Kenzi's waist. “I will in a moment. We need to talk...and I need to apologize to you.” Jami sighed heavily. “I wasn't exactly honest with you about how Lexi found out about what you told me...I wasn't telling her anything. She started going through my phone yesterday while I was in the bathroom and found our conversation. I should have tried to warn you as soon as I could, but she threw the phone and started hitting me the second I tried to explain.”
Kenzi frowned. “What the fuck do you mean, she hit you?!” Kenzi was instantly filled with rage, as if a switch had been thrown. “I'LL KILL THAT BITCH!!! WHAT DID SHE DO? WHERE THE FUCK IS SHE?!!!”
Jami's eyes widened as if she was seeing something happen for the first time. “Mackenzie, please...” Jami brought her hand to Kenzi's face, speaking softly. “You'll get your chance to pay her back in spades, I promise. Besides...it was worth it....because I realized how right you were about everything.” Jami takes a deep breath, sighing in content. “I also talked to your mom last night...she told me everything, honey.”
Kenzi's eyes grew wide at the mention of her mother. The anger was now mingled with confusion. “WHAT?! WHAT ARE YOU SAYING?!!”
“I know why you've been so easy to upset with everyone else...and I can handle it. And I know why you act differently with me than you do everyone else.” Jami looks into Kenzi's dark eyes. “Mackenzie...I told your mom how I felt about you...and she's given me her approval, if tentatively...”
Kenzi stumbled back, pushing her away. She looked completely in tatters, unsure of what was up or down. “I have to go...I want to go...NOW! TAKE ME BACK TO TINA'S!!”
Jami stands before Kenzi, on the verge of tears. She expected a better response than this. “As you wish, Michaela...just...give me a chance to change first....” Jami turns and begins to gather more conservative clothes compared to the skirt and top she was still wearing from the night before.
Kenzi was a wreck, she had no idea what to think or feel. She had run from her mother and now Jamilyn was throwing in with her? Her feelings for Jamilyn made this even more confusing to her. What was happening?
Suddenly, Jami stopped. She turned around and put her hands on her hips, having forgotten that she'd stripped down to her strapless bra and boycut panties, both purple in color. “No...something else is off here. You didn't panic until I mentioned your mom...is there something I need to know about, Mackenzie? Something I need to protect you from?”
Kenzi stared at her. “...you, apparently! If you won't take me...I'll walk...or take a cab!!”
Jami tilted her head. “Look, Mackenzie, I'm on your side here. And from the way AJ and Megan are talking, there's a lot more going on here than I'm aware of. I want to make sure you're safe and sound, but I can't do that if I don't know what the deal is between you and your mom. Please...you can trust me...I want to help you.” Jami sighed. “I only talked to your mom because if I didn't, they were going to threaten legal action to get you back home, and I couldn't risk that, not in the condition you were in. Please....you know I wouldn't intentionally do anything to hurt you, Mackenzie...” Jami slowly stepped forward, her near-nude body swaying as she did, and caressed Kenzi's cheek. “I love you, sweetie...I'd do anything to protect you. Please...I need to know what's going on, babygirl.”
Ordinarily, she would have relished the visual, but there was just too much going on at the moment. She fell into Jamilyn's arms and held her tightly. “I just need time to think...I can't do that with you here. I need time...just a little more time.” She leaned up and kissed her cheek lightly, resisting the urge to go further until she figured out what was going on.
“Fair enough...and thank you.” Jami looked upon Kenzi with a smile. “You're showing that you care more about me as a person than an object. Any other girl would have already had her hand in my panties....but you're different...in a good way.” Jami leaned down and kissed Kenzi's lips tenderly.
Kenzi nearly pulled away as thoughts of hurting Tina came to mind, but she accepted for as long as she could and then slowly pulled away as her body threatened to betray her good sense. “We'll talk more...after I clear my head and...and make amends for being a little shit. Thank you Jamilyn...for not taking advantage last night...or right now. I couldn't forgive myself...”
“You're not the only one who needs to clear their head, honey. If you ever need me, let me know. I'll be there as soon as I can.” Jami responded.
Kenzi sighed, “I feel like I always need you, but I need to get my house in order first...and so do you!” Her thoughts turned back to Alexis and her mood grew visibly darker. “Especially Blake...”
Jami nodded. “At least we both agree on that.” Jami went back to her clothes and began to put on her outfit for the day. “Honestly...I think I need to be single for a while anyway. Much as I think Tina enables some of your riskier behavior at times, I can't exactly expect you to leave her and come to me...”
She flinched at the mention of Tina...and Jamilyn's thoughts on being single. It felt like a missed opportunity, but the timing was wrong...and feelings were involved and raw on all sides. Kenzi only nodded her head, turning away and wrapping her arms around herself. “I'm ready to go, as soon as you are...”
(A FEW HOURS LATER)
Jami walks up to the mailbox at home and finds a mysterious looking package in it. She walks into the house and heads straight up to her bedroom. She opens the box and her eyes open wide. “Son of a bitch...she actually did it!” She pulled out at note and read it…
“I just wanted you to see that you have an affect on me that I can't fight or understand. I don't know if it's love or just sex...a bit of both...or maybe neither. My brain keeps telling me not to do this...but the devil on my shoulder keeps screaming "FUCK IT!"
Sorry... ♡♡♡”
Jami picks up the small pair of panties that was included in the box and sniffs them. Ooooh yeah, she was hooked now.
22 June 2016
LAS VEGAS, NV
Things were getting hot and heavy between us...with Tina now in Rehab and me pretty much a prisoner in her home while her armor clad Amazon, Nicole watched over me. I was feeling terrible about possibly betraying Tina...though I viewed her leaving me as a betrayal of a sort. I was so confused...but thoughts of Jamilyn always made things clearer.
I thought about her...and so she reached out to me in answer, so it seemed...
People use the term BOMBSHELL way too often. It loses a little something when you misuse it. I'm not misusing it. I got hit with a fucking bombshell!
I went to talk to Tina...to do the right thing before anything happened. I told Tina that I was going to leave...I had feelings for someone else...I had feelings for Jamilyn Cornett...
BOMBSHELL!!!!
I wasn't making good decisions...I was three sheets to the wind and all alone. I knew what I wanted...I just had no idea how badly I needed it. Alcohol gave me the courage to reach out to Jamilyn...and do something very, very stupid...
Jami dials the phone and sets it down, and Kenzi can hear Jami's voice. She listens as the sounds of sex fill her ears. Kenzi sniffs a bit...and the line disconnects...
I am going to spare you all the gory details...just like I spared you all from the way harsher and more graphic language and images that were shared between Jamilyn Cornett and I. As a concession...I will grant you this...
True to her word, Jamilyn came back to Los Angeles...leaving her friends Cali-Kate and Amy Jo Smyth to wonder where she was off to. She came back and she did exactly as I asked her to do. When it was all said and done...she waited for me to concede and allow her to kiss me...but I did not...even though, I really wanted her to.
Jamilyn needed to put her house in order before we could do anything more...she needed to address this with Cali-Kate...the last of her so called 'herd.' I won't lie to you and tell you that there wasn't more that took place between us afterwards...a lot more happened...
A LOT
But...not before the 'herd' was finally reduced to zero. There still needed to be that final assurance...and that was to come at LAW 49...a meeting between me, Jamilyn, and Cali-Kate to settle up and move our relationship in whatever direction it was bound to head after that. I could hardly wait...
Of course...this entire time...I had all but ignored Mindy De Santiago...my opponent for Queen of the ring. I'm sure she hasn't ignored me...but what more can I say? She wants to be Queen of the Ring...and me...I just want to be happy...
Tomorrow...we were going to find out who got exactly what they wanted...
14 June 2016
LOS ANGELES, CA
Kenzi had been completely out of sorts since her run in with Jamilyn Cornett the week before. She had gone to see the woman and take the measure of her since Alex Yin and damn near every other woman she knew was either sleeping with her or talking about sleeping with her. Kenzi had intended to find out what she had over her ex…but instead of getting answers…she ended up getting put under the woman’s spell.
She had hoped to seduce the diminutive vixen, but instead, she ended up at the woman’s mercy. She couldn’t explain it…but it had come over her like a tidal wave and before she knew it, she was the one that was nearly at the woman’s mercy. She had barely been able to escape the woman’s house without surrendering herself to her…but with an effort worthy of a saint, she had managed to do so…
…or so she thought…
Her mind had replayed their meeting over and over inside her head. She couldn’t get the thought of her out of her own mind. What was happening to her? What power did this woman hold over her…and why did she find it so intoxicating? She needed to be focusing on her match…not on the woman that was seducing her ex-fiancée…the one that had nearly seduced her. The Queen of the Ring is what mattered…facing Mindy De Santiago…the rest could wait…
BUZZ-BUZZ
Kenzi picked up her phone and stared at the screen, her heart skipping as she realized that it was from Jamilyn Cornett. She knew that she should have tossed the phone away or just deleted the message without even looking at it, but she couldn’t help herself…
Jamilyn Cornett Text: Kenzi, are you really okay? The way you stormed out, I was worried sick about you. <3
Kenzi Grey Text: I want you to stop...please!
Jamilyn Cornett Text: Stop what? U__U Did I do something wrong?
Kenzi Grey Text: I came to see you because of Alex! I...I didn't want anything else! And...no...it's me, you did nothing wrong. Let's just forget about last night, okay? I don't blame you for anything...you or Alex. I see the problem...it's me. Take care...
Jamilyn Cornett Text: I can't, Kenzi. The moments we shared....I felt a true bond between us, like our hearts attached together. And I know you felt it too. I could feel your heart jump when I touched you. You are not a problem, Kenzi...at least not to me.
Kenzi Grey Text: I was so angry at Alex, but she did the right thing. I know that...you opened my eyes and I appreciate that...but we can't do that again. I can't go through this again. Sorry...
Jamilyn Cornett Text: You have no idea how amazing it felt inside when you kissed me....I never wanted you to stop. And I don't think you did either. I'm glad I could help in some way, sweetheart, but I can't just ignore how we both felt last night.
Kenzi Grey Text: You should...trust me. Talk to Alex...it doesn't end well...so I'd rather not start it!
Jamilyn Cornett Text: That was the public Kenzi everyone else knows. The Kenzi that kissed me was totally different. And I'll risk what I have to to keep that Kenzi in my life.
Kenzi Grey Text: Can't happen...I won't let it.
Jamilyn Cornett Text: Just answer me this one question....if you didn't have any other influences around you...how far would you have gone with me last night? And be honest with me... Because I haven't been able to get to sleep since then. I've been thinking only of you. The way your sexy dress clung to every curve you have, the way your caramel skin looked against my pale body, the way your dark eyes looked as I held you, the way your full pouty lips felt as they touched mine...
Kenzi Grey Text: I'm not going to answer that question! You already know the answer anyway! Look...I like you...I like you a lot, but I don't know how to share. This thing I had with Alex...it showed me that I'm not cut out for...whatever it was that happened last night! If you care about me...just drop this...okay? I'm begging you... If you care about me...really care...you'll leave me alone...
Jamilyn Cornett Text: *sighs* I don't know if I can Kenzi....I think I'm too far in....in love with you to be able to leave you alone.
Kenzi Grey Text: I see you all over social media! You can't love that many people...it's not possible! Maybe you think you love me...but it's fleeting and I can't have another heartbreak like that...I won't survive it. If you care, you'll respect my wishes.
Jamilyn Cornett Text: It's not fleeting. And I know you feel something similar for me. You kissed me first, remember? And I'm polyamorous, remember? I love more than one person, but I love all my girls equally. I promise you, I won't break your heart like everyone else has.
Kenzi Grey Text: I don't love your girls! I despise them! I'd hurt them... Don't believe me? Ask Alex about Hannah...I can't help myself! I saw what I did to her...I won't do that to anyone else...EVER! Just leave me alone...
Jamilyn Cornett Text: I'm not asking you to love them, or even respect them....I'm asking you to be honest about how you feel about me. Everyone else is a non-factor; this is you and me. Whatever you do to Lexi isn't my place, that was going on long before I came into the picture. I'm just concerned about you. But I can see I'm pushing you too hard....so I'll back off. Just trust me when I say I see the good you have inside of you. You're not a bad person...you've just had a lot of bad stuff happen that you've not been able to work past. And I can help with that, if you'll let me. And know that my home, my arms, and my heart are always open to you, my caramel princess. <3
And so it had begun, then and there...my conversations with Jamilyn Cornett. I should have been training and readying myself to face Mindy on Sunday night at LAW 49, but I was too busy flirting over social media with the girlfriend of the woman that wanted to beat the living hell out of me. I knew it was wrong and that is why I fought so hard to resist...but every time she would DM me...things got deeper and deeper between us.
I didn't want to hurt Alexis Blake...at least not like that. I had my limits. I would do to her, what had been done to me. I had no intention of carrying on with her girlfriend. Our little kissing match at Jamilyn's house had been a one and done...I had put it behind me, as best I could...never to revisit it again...but...things done in the dark have a strange way of being brought into the light...
Jamilyn Cornett Text: T__T Lexi just got five shades of pissed at me for last night....somehow she found out about our kissing.
Kenzi Grey Text: It wasn't me! You have all my video!!
Jamilyn Cornett Text: I know, and I trust you. I just...someone had to have told her.
Kenzi Grey Text: I hate her guts, but, I'd never do that to her or anyone else!
Jamilyn Cornett Text: I know, babe. Like I said, I trust you completely. I think she'll be okay. Just know that I don't share her opinion about you at all. I care about you deeply, as you well know. Do u think imma whore, Kenzi? </3
Kenzi Grey Text: I don't do labels...You're free with yours...if it works for you...
Jamilyn Cornett Text: *hugs tight* Thank you...for being the one person in the last 24 hours that made me feel wanted and loved. <3 *tender kiss*
15 June 2016
LOS ANGLES, CA
After Alexis had savagely ripped me a new ass over Twitter...Jamilyn had managed to smooth things over. I have no idea what she said or what she did, but I was grateful. I wanted to put that episode behind me...but there would be no such luck. Jamilyn had her sights on me...and whether I wanted to resist or not...she wasn't taking no for an answer...
Jamilyn Cornett Text: Kenzi...I know you're trying to keep a public face, I get that...but I know we feel for each other deeper than friends. I miss you right now...I wish you were holding me and kissing me like you did a few nights ago.
Kenzi Grey Text: That was a mistake...I was weak and not thinking straight...literally! I like you a lot...but I can't live like you do. I'm a jealous person...violently so. That would drive you away...and hurt me as well. I don't want to hurt anymore...sorry.
Jamilyn Cornett Text: You...you do like me? Like...romantically?
Kenzi Grey Text: NO! I'm in love with Colin! Like I said...it was a moment of weakness and confusion. Nothing more...
Jamilyn Cornett Text: Kenzi...please...don't lie to me. I promise, no judgments. I felt the way your heart jumped when I touched you...I felt the energy behind your kiss...you can be 100% honest with me. Whatever you tell me, I promise, will stay with me. And I haven't let you down on a promise, have I?
Kenzi Grey Text: That was a mistake...I'm glad we didn't make it any worse. We cannot ever let that happen again. You love people and I love Colin...let's leave things there.
Jamilyn Cornett Text: ....Colin's made up, isn't he, Kenzi?
Kenzi Grey Text: He works for the same company we do, silly!
Jamilyn Cornett Text: So if I were to go up and ask him if you and him were an item, he'd say yes...might have to do that at the next LAW show...assuming I have reason enough to even go.
Kenzi Grey Text: He's a gentleman...he doesn't kiss and tell. Neither do I!
Jamilyn Cornett Text: Kenzi...please...you know I'm not like everyone else...you can tell me the truth.
Kenzi Grey Text: Please drop this. I just want to be happy and get along with everyone...
Jamilyn Cornett Text: Okay......I'll drop this. Besides...you have a girl in your life that adores you and desperately needs you right now. But Kenzi...if you ever change your mind....my door and my heart are always open to you. <3
16 June 2016
LOS ANGLES, CA
That girl was Christina Hall...or Tina for short. I had been staying with her while I tried to keep it together...but there was just one problem...Tina was a half insane recovering addict and alcoholic. She was the perfect foil for where I was in life. She enabled all of my bad habits and I enabled hers. I began drinking in earnest...and acting out in the very worst of ways.
To Tina's credit, she tried to clean up for me...she quit...well...after she damn near died of alcohol poisoning...which was largely my fault. She ended up in the hospital and I was running the streets like a mad woman...drunk off my ass and pissing off everyone I encountered. It wasn't until the next morning that I realized how out of control I had been...
Jamilyn Cornett Text: Hey kenzi...are you feeling better?
Kenzi Grey Text: Better...I hope I didn't say anything crazy last night...it's a blur...but my timeline is...it's horrible! I can't even read it all!
Jamilyn Cornett Text: It's okay. Anything you said to me, I forgive you for. But what exactly happened last night, honey?
Kenzi Grey Text: I don't know...I don't remember. Something with my Mom...I don't know. I'm going to see Tina now...I really hurt her...
Jamilyn Cornett Text: That girl loves you so much, Kenzi...much like Lexi loves me. Or at least used to...Tina deserves your full affection.
Kenzi Grey Text: I hurt you too...I'm sorry... You won't have to worry about me anymore. You and Alexis...
Jamilyn Cornett Text: For what it's worth, I still care about you greatly, Kenzi...and what I said before still stands. As for hurting me...you technically didn't do anything wrong.
Kenzi Grey Text: ...but I want to... I better go...sorry...
Jamilyn Cornett Text: Wait...Kenzi, what do you mean by that? Please, talk to me...
Kenzi Grey Text: Nothing...I'm with Tina. Thank you for not hating me.
Jamilyn Cornett Text: You know how I feel about you, Kenzi...I could never hate you...not after the way you.... wait... is that what you meant by "But I want to"?
17 June 2018
LOS ANGELES, CA
I was smart not to answer her question about what I really wanted...because the answer was most certainly her. I didn't need to be encouraging her...I needed to be putting her out of my mind. I tried my best...but my best sucked ass! I followed her relentlessly on social media...stalking her from afar. It could have ended there...but no...my dumb ass had to go and make mention of her referring to her HOES as her 'HERD.' Frankly, it was none of my business...but I opened my big fat mouth...and just like that...Jamilyn Cornett came busting right back into my life...
...admittedly, just like I wanted her to...
Jamilyn Cornett Text: Kenzi...why are you suddenly getting all defensive about my wording? And why did you suddenly retract when I said the only reason you'd be doing so was if you wanted to be one of my girls?
Kenzi Grey Text: Don't do this Jami...I shouldn't have said anything! You're right...okay? Just drop it...PLEASE!
Jamilyn Cornett Text: What do you mean I'm right? I'm not dropping this until you start telling me why you're acting like you're in love with me.
Kenzi Grey Text: I'M NOT IN LOVE WITH YOU OR ANYONE ELSE!! If you ask me, neither are you!!
Jamilyn Cornett Text: ....Ke....Kenzi...
Kenzi Grey Text: Look...I shouldn't have said anything...but I couldn't help myself...not after we... Things got intense between us and it confused me. I kept thinking about it...I keep thinking about it. But it was a mistake...I know it now... Every time I see you tweet an out your 'girls' it bothers me...it shouldn't, but it does!
Jamilyn Cornett Text: And it didn't confuse me? To feel the soft caramel lips of one of the hottest people I've ever crushed on kissing me as if she wanted to claim me for her own? It's been constantly on my mind too, Kenzi...but I don't think it was a mistake. Be honest with me, please...just between you and me...how much do you care about me?
Kenzi Grey Text: I'm being stupid...and I'm sorry, okay?!
Jamilyn Cornett Text: You're not being stupid...if there's really something between us, I want to know about it, sweetie. Okay, so you know how serious I am being about this...what's your full legal name?
Kenzi Grey Text: It's just physical...it has to be... I can say no to that...I should just block you...I don't need to see you...tempting me. I can't be like one of your girls...I could only be YOUR girl...
Why does this feel like an interrogation?
Mackenzie Michaela Grey...happy?
You want honesty? When I see you with the others...I feel jealous and angry... When you talk to me...I feel myself wanting you...and I'm ashamed for it... My body is betraying my mind because I don't want to be anyone's side chick! That's what I'd be...and I refuse to be that! I'm rambling...I hate this! I don't want to do this anymore! I'm leaving you alone...okay?
Why does this feel like an interrogation?
Mackenzie Michaela Grey...happy?
You want honesty? When I see you with the others...I feel jealous and angry... When you talk to me...I feel myself wanting you...and I'm ashamed for it... My body is betraying my mind because I don't want to be anyone's side chick! That's what I'd be...and I refuse to be that! I'm rambling...I hate this! I don't want to do this anymore! I'm leaving you alone...okay?
Jamilyn Cornett Text: Mackenzie...how...how long have you felt like this about me?
Kenzi Grey Text: It doesn't matter because that is fantasy and I live in reality! You have your girls...your herd...and I have Tina now...it's just the way things are.
Jamilyn Cornett Text: And what if I'm getting tired of a 'herd'? What if I feel the same way about you talking to Tina that you do about me talking to all these girls and that it breaks my heart because I feel like she's enabling you to make these dangerous decisions when all I want is your safety?
What if I've been crushing on you since the moment you and I started talking months ago and was more jealous of Alex this whole time than you've ever been of anyone I've been involved with? What if you knew just how much your touch aroused me and that your kissing me meant more to me in just those brief moments than any other romantic interaction I've had since Juliana left me?
...if I'm going to make an educated decision, one that I know is going to piss a LOT of people off but could make you the happiest girl in the world, I need to know all about you and why you've been so upset lately.
What if I've been crushing on you since the moment you and I started talking months ago and was more jealous of Alex this whole time than you've ever been of anyone I've been involved with? What if you knew just how much your touch aroused me and that your kissing me meant more to me in just those brief moments than any other romantic interaction I've had since Juliana left me?
...if I'm going to make an educated decision, one that I know is going to piss a LOT of people off but could make you the happiest girl in the world, I need to know all about you and why you've been so upset lately.
Kenzi Grey Text: I see you telling your ladies how much you love them...I see you drooling over the other girls posting their bodies all over the place! I can't compete with that and I don't want to! You THINK you want a one woman relationship, but you'd get bored...I know it and so do you. Tina makes me forget how bad things were by letting me be me... I care about her...I hurt her once...I won't do it again.
Jamilyn Cornett Text: I'm only this way because I was broken by Juliana. If the right girl came along...I'd be completely satisfied. If it were you...you'd never have to compete...because I'd stop those antics in a heartbeat if the right girl came along and showed me how she felt. Does she give you the same feelings I do, Mackenzie?
Kenzi Grey Text: I feel exposed with you...and it scares me... If I'm not the right girl...what happens to me then? You don't want to know...neither do I...
Let's just forget this...let's just content ourselves with what we have.
Let's just forget this...let's just content ourselves with what we have.
Jamilyn Cornett Text: Exposed how, sweetie?
Kenzi Grey Text: We dodged a bullet...and even though I dream about what might have been...I know how this ends...badly... I have no defense against you...all I could do was run...
I'm still running...
I'm still running...
Jamilyn Cornett Text: ....you dream about me? Is it...is it the same way I dream about you?
Kenzi Grey Text: I dream about touching you...feeling you against me...feeling myself inside you...
I hear you moan...I feel it...I want to drive you over the edge...because I'm right there with you... JESUS! I CAN'T DO THIS!! TINA IS RIGHT HER SLEEPING NEXT TO ME!!!
I hear you moan...I feel it...I want to drive you over the edge...because I'm right there with you... JESUS! I CAN'T DO THIS!! TINA IS RIGHT HER SLEEPING NEXT TO ME!!!
Jamilyn Cornett Text: ....you ARE in love with me, aren't you, Mackenzie?
Kenzi Grey Text: ...I don't know what that is... Maybe it's just sex... Maybe it's more...how do you know? Do you know?! It feels like I'm on fucking fire!
Jamilyn Cornett Text: We both know that if this was just sex, you wouldn't be so driven about staying away from me. That wasn't a "fuck me till I'm sore" kiss you gave me....that was an "I'm opening my heart to you, please don't break it" kiss. There may be a highly sexual element to it, sure....but I know what an 'in love" kiss feels like compared to a "physical attraction" kiss...and you kissed me like I was your one and only girl that day. And for the first time in a long while...I forgot everyone else...and only wanted to be with you. ...you're touching yourself right now, aren't you, Mackenzie?
Kenzi Grey Text: I'm wishing it was you...but it's not...and it never will be you! I can't let it... Go to your girls...I'm going to go to mine. I'll close my eyes and for a few hours, it will be you and me...and when it's over...you'll be out of my system...for good. Okay?
Jamilyn Cornett Text: I think what's going on is, you're deeply in love with me, but you don't want to admit it because with Tina, you can still have that shield up and project an image of toughness and borderline insanity that keeps everyone else at a distance....but with me, you have no barrier...your heart is exposed for who you truly are, and you fear not only what I'd be willing to sacrifice to be with you, but that you'll never be the same if you let me in.
Something's keeping you from admitting your true feelings...something that's been your reason for pushing everyone else away, and it both frustrates and excites you that everything you've done to push me away hasn't worked...because you know I feel the same about you. Am I in the ball park? That's why pretending Tina is me will never work. Because she won't be able to touch you like I did. She won't be able to open you up and warm your core like I do. And she'll never kiss you the way I do.
Something's keeping you from admitting your true feelings...something that's been your reason for pushing everyone else away, and it both frustrates and excites you that everything you've done to push me away hasn't worked...because you know I feel the same about you. Am I in the ball park? That's why pretending Tina is me will never work. Because she won't be able to touch you like I did. She won't be able to open you up and warm your core like I do. And she'll never kiss you the way I do.
Kenzi Grey Text: Don't confuse me wanting to fuck you for something else! If we had given in to each other, we wouldn't be having this conversation right now! You'd be back to your herd and I'd be regretting being a notch in your bedpost! I was in love once...it hurt me...I don't want it anymore! It's just words...I'll say them to Tina...and she'll believe them and that will be good enough. She needs me and I need to be needed. You don't need anyone...you only want...
Jamilyn Cornett Text: *shakes head* No...you're starting to open my eyes, Mackenzie. I don't think I'm really happy living my life like this anymore. I haven't been able to stop thinking about you since our kiss. And I'm not confusing it, because you know as well as I do that if you really wanted to fuck me, dressed as you were, you would have had me in the bedroom well before then. But I touched something inside you that day...I know it. I'll prove it.
Ask me anything you want about my life, something that you think I'd never dare tell anyone else.
Ask me anything you want about my life, something that you think I'd never dare tell anyone else.
Kenzi Grey Text: I think you'll tell anything...you're damn near shameless! LOL But...I'll play... How many girls are you currently sleeping with...and mean ALL of them...no judgments...I just want to know...
Jamilyn Cornett Text: Not counting one-time encounters, I've been regularly involved with at least ten girls for a few weeks now. Everyone else has been either a one-time thing or I've dropped since. And yes, you're right in that I would have publicly admitted that. I was hoping you would ask something more about my past.
Kenzi Grey Text: You wouldn't even count them all...because you can't! You go from girl to girl because you only WANT...you don't stay because you have no idea what you NEED! What made you this way? Why can't any one person fill that void in you? I'm not arrogant enough to think I could.
Jamilyn Cornett Text: You're right. I'm such a slut...but I don't want to be.
....if I had to guess...it was when I found out my stepfather had beaten me so bad I could never have a child of my own again. I didn't think anyone could possibly desire to spend the rest of their life with someone so broken and ruined like me...
Especially when you're dealing with that after having to bury your only child at 16 years old...
....if I had to guess...it was when I found out my stepfather had beaten me so bad I could never have a child of my own again. I didn't think anyone could possibly desire to spend the rest of their life with someone so broken and ruined like me...
Especially when you're dealing with that after having to bury your only child at 16 years old...
Kenzi Grey Text: You think that makes you unworthy of being loved? You're wrong...you need that more than ever. You think all of these encounters are love...but it's fleeting. It's just a band-aid...it's not real love. I don't know what real love is either...but it's not what you think it is!
Jamilyn Cornett Text: ...if you were my girlfriend, Mackenzie...and my real, 100% committed girlfriend, not an 'encounter' as you put it...how would you show me how much you need me?
Kenzi Grey Text: ...I don't know...but I think that's just it...isn't it? Living for someone else...instead of yourself...
Jamilyn Cornett Text: ...even if the people around you are telling you not to do it? Even if they may hate you for even trying to be kind to that person, let alone fall in love with them?
Kenzi Grey Text: I hate the thought of you with Alexis...I'm jealous of her! I hate her... But I know how she'd feel if you left her...I felt that. I'd never wish that on anyone...or any of your other 10 girls... I'm a hateful bitch...but I'm a hateful bitch with limits...
I wanted to die earlier this year...part of me still wishes I had. Maybe that's real love...if it is...if don't want it! But for fucks sake...if think I want you! I don't want to...and I'm fighting it... You should do the same. Don't hurt them like I got hurt...figure this out...for all our sakes...
I need to shower...Tina can't see me like this... My panties are fucking ruined! I should fucking mail them to you...BITCH!
I wanted to die earlier this year...part of me still wishes I had. Maybe that's real love...if it is...if don't want it! But for fucks sake...if think I want you! I don't want to...and I'm fighting it... You should do the same. Don't hurt them like I got hurt...figure this out...for all our sakes...
I need to shower...Tina can't see me like this... My panties are fucking ruined! I should fucking mail them to you...BITCH!
Jamilyn Cornett Text: And yet...if Lexi truly loved me for who I am, she wouldn't have punished me for being the open-hearted soul that wouldn't dare let someone feel like you have.
...did...did you just....climax for me?
...did...did you just....climax for me?
Kenzi Grey Text: I fucking hate you... I'm signing off...check your goddamn mailbox later!
Jamilyn Cornett Text: No you don't. I don't think you can hate me....you're in love with me. Just admit it already, Mackenzie... I'm willing to consider pissing off a lot of people to be with you....but I can't walk into this blindly.
Kenzi Grey Text: Done talking...I have stuff to do! And by stuff...I mean Tina! Leave this alone...okay?
Jamilyn Cornett Text: ...I love you, Mackenzie Michaela Grey. I truly do.
Kenzi Grey Text: Pissing people off? Is that what you think this will do? I WAS DESTROYED JAMI! This is why I can't do this...why I won't be a part of it! You have ZERO idea what this means! THINK!!! PLEASE!!!
You're killing me... I have to go...she's getting up...this has to stop...
You're killing me... I have to go...she's getting up...this has to stop...
Jamilyn Cornett Text: ....then tell me what this means, honey. What is so bad about being with me that it makes you so scared and frightened?
Kenzi Grey Text: You'll never be just mines...you don't know how to be... Goodbye... But I want to be....
There I go...I said it again...like a fucking dumb ass! "But I want to be..." What I goddamn moron I am! Yeah...I wanted Jamilyn...but at the same time, I didn't want her. She lived a lifestyle that wasn't at all for me. I don't do poly...not now...and not ever! Even for her. She was driving me up the wall...and by this time, so was Tina.
To her credit, Tina was doing what she could to recover...but all I wanted to do was get wasted and forget the world. I drank more and more...and like always...it was like a siren call to Jamilyn...she always knew...always found me...
Jamilyn Cornett Text: Mackenzie, I just saw your tweet...please...don't do what I think you're going to do...drinking isn't going to solve this...
Kenzi Grey Text: ...I'm ignoring you...I suggest you do the same...
Jamilyn Cornett Text: I can't just ignore the possibility of you putting yourself into the hospital for alcohol poisoning! Damnit, Michaela, can't you see how much I care about you?!
Kenzi Grey Text: Yes...I see it every day...I see your 'herd' all fucking day...EVERYDAY! Signing OFF!!!
Jamilyn Cornett Text: No, this is different! Mackenzie, please...I am begging you...don't do this! Fine...if you want me to leave you alone, I'll leave you alone. You want me to ignore you, I won't even pay you mind. You don't want me to interfere with you and Tina, by all means, I'll full-stop that immediately...just PLEASE don't drink yourself into the hospital because of me and what I said this morning!
I was strong and I ignored her. I felt strong for once...I was saying no to crack! Crack was whack! Who was I kidding? I was not escaping my addiction that easily. Several more angry tweets from Alexis Blake keyed me in to things that were going on in the Cornett household...just as much strife as I was trying to avoid with Tina...
Alexis had obviously been reading my texts with Jamilyn...and she was none too fucking happy. As for me...I was none to happy about that shit either!
Kenzi Grey Text: ARE YOU TALKING TO LEX ABOUT ME?!!!
STOP PLAYING GAMES WITH ME!!!
STOP PLAYING GAMES WITH ME!!!
Jamilyn Cornett Text: You said to leave you alone, and I am. You also got me to realize who has shown me they care compared to who hasn't. You're right...I was being an idiot about this...but I know where my heart is now...and it's with Lexi. Thank you for waking me up and making me realize that.
Kenzi Grey Text: FINE!!!
Jamilyn Cornett Text: I had to tell her, Kenzi...you saw how she flipped out on me last time. God, I'm so fucking confused right now...
Kenzi Grey Text: You really fucking hurt me just now! I thought these conversations were special...I LET MY GUARD DOWN WITH YOU! I can never trust you again...NEVER!
Jamilyn Cornett Text: And you're hurting me by denying how you feel! I keep trying to tell you, Mackenzie, I didn't have a choice. It was either tell her outright or risk losing everything if she decided to snoop on my phone, which she's liable to do.
That was the straw that broke the camel's back! She was going her way and I was going mine. At least...that is what I thought was happening. While I was trying my best to work out things with a very pissed off Tina...Jamilyn was trying to figure things out as well...but not with Alexis...
Sidney Grey, her head covered by a large floppy hat, sat on the sunbathed deck of the exclusive restaurant that she had selected as the meeting place for her and her guest, a woman that had expressed a desire to meet her over the welfare of her wayward daughter. Ordinarily, she would have ignored the woman completely, but for some reason, she was the only one whose concern seemed genuine enough to entertain. She didn’t care for it…but things with Kenzi were getting way out of hand and she was getting desperate.
Sidney picked up her afternoon cocktail and sipped at it as she eyed the woman being escorted to her table. She cut her eyes over to the O’Connell’s a few tables over, likely still fuming over their tag team loss to the woman and her partner…but this wasn’t a wrestling match and they were itching for the woman to overstep her bounds and give them a chance to wail on her. She gestured for them to remain seated as Jamilyn was brought to her table and their uncomfortable meeting of the minds began.
Sid was the first to speak as she gave a smirk, “Forgive me for not standing…” she gestured to her wheelchair, “…I already have my seat…so why don’t you take one…and I’d rather not dilly dally…this is about my daughter, plain and simple, nothing else!” Sid watched her like a hawk, wanting nothing more than for this meeting to be quick and to the point.
Jamilyn nodded, taking her seat simply. "I have no judgments about your seating arrangements, Miss Grey. I've grown concerned about Mackenzie in recent times. Her increasingly destructive behavior, her constant mood swings...her different behavior with me than everyone else, including...Colin." Jamilyn chose her wording carefully, unsure what Sidney knew of Tina or herself. "Though I myself can't personally be involved anymore, I at least need to know why she's so different around me than she is everyone else. And as much as you remind me of my own mother...and not in a positive light...since Mackenzie won't tell me anything, you're the only one that can give me any sort of answers as to why she seems like I would have been without the support I had from my family."
Sid regarded Jamilyn carefully, taking in her words and watching her mannerisms. It was obvious that she was concerned about Kenzi…but there was something more there as well. She didn’t care for it, but these were fast becoming desperate times. Sid dismissed her comments about being compared to Jamilyn’s mother. It truly didn’t matter to her. “Do you REALLY think I intend to tell you my daughter’s deepest and darkest secrets…knowing that you’ll just spread it all over the place with impunity? I saw you’re social media exchange with Kenzi earlier…and while I can’t guess what was said, the fact that you could just share her private thoughts with other people…disturbs me!”
Sid sighed, “I agreed to this meeting when I thought you cared about my daughter more than you cared about the wetness of your overly used crotch…but now I’m starting to see things differently!” She sipped at her drink, her eyes still on Jamilyn. As she put it back down, she framed her words carefully, “The only reason I am still willing to talk to you is because regardless of how I feel about your shitty attitude and lifestyle…you’re the only one who hasn’t driven her to slitting her wrists…yet! That means she values what you say…even if what you say is complete garbage!”
Sid reached into her bag and pulled out a document, sliding it over to her as she gestured for Dana to come to her side. “That is a non-disclosure agreement…” she gestured to Dana, “…and this is our witness. If you want to talk about Kenzi…it will be under these terms…ONLY!” Sid sat back, lacing her fingers, “My daughter has a career to protect…and I don’t need you flapping lips ruining it!” She smirked, “The ones on your face…not the ones between your legs!”
Jamilyn nodded. Time to put her cards on the table. "Your daughter won't admit she's in love with me, Sidney." Jamilyn leaned back in her chair. "She's told me everything she wants to do to me...in every detail imaginable. But because of your hatred for homosexual relationships, she's too frightened to be herself. She's a beautiful and intelligent girl, and if she would--"
Jamilyn could see Dana's face snarl as she talked. She frowned, but redirected the conversation. "I will not deny being in love with her myself, Miss Grey. My only reason for not pursuing it any further is at your own daughter's insistence that I not do so. That being said, considering that the last time Mackenzie and I had an exchange things didn't exactly go over so well with one of my closer girlfriends, I was not about to risk her being angry with me. Mackenzie refuses to even consider me as an option...so I did what I thought was right. I figure you of all people would understand that. If I could go back and change things, I would. I do care romantically about your daughter, Miss Grey. I can't help that I do. I am in love with Mackenzie, I hate that Tina's enabling her like hell, if Mackenzie would just tell me the truth I'd dump everyone else I'm with to be with her....and I know by saying that, I've just pissed you off, and I think I'm okay with that. But regardless of what we think about each other, at least give me credit for laying myself out there so you know exactly what I think of her with no fear of repercussions. And you know I'm telling the truth, because if I didn't care about your daughter, I wouldn't even be here right now daring to say any of this to your face."
Jami picks up the pen and opens it, looking over the language of the contract as she studies it, hoping that (A) she didn't overreach her boundaries with Sidney, and (B) she hasn't shot herself in the foot before she's even had a chance to hear Sidney out.
Sid drummed her fingernails rhythmically on the table as she stared at Jamilyn, still reading over the NDA that would inflict heavy penalties for public disclosure of any kind concerning their discussions. While she continued to mull it over, Sid addressed her earlier comments. “You think that I dislike all lesbians…but I don’t…I dislike predators like you and like Alex Yin…probably that drug addled buffoon Tina Hall as well! I dislike you because this isn’t just a lifestyle…it’s your way to control people…specifically the women in your lives. You think I know nothing of it because I’m not a lesbian…but you’re wrong…I know what you are because you’re no different than all of the drooling men that jump from bed to bed sticking your prick in any willing snatch that will have it! They control weak women that way…keep them under thumb until someone better comes along…” she shook her head, “…or if you have a talented enough tongue, you manage to keep them both!”
Sid signaled for another drink and ordered one for Jamilyn, not bothering to ask her what she wanted or if she wanted anything at all. “You claim to love my daughter and while I doubt that…while I really hope that’s not the case…I know for a fact that she probably does love you…” Sid chuckled, the let out a long sigh.
“For fucks sake, just sign the damn NDA so we can clear the air…unless you think I have some clause in there about forcing you to eat me out!” She slapped her hand on the table, “While we’re young…or at least still breathing!”
Jamilyn smiled at the idea of falling "Sidney...I just gave up all my other girlfriends...to even have a chance with Mackenzie." Jamilyn said as she signed the agreement. "I'm willing to make that kind of sacrifice for her. And if I was such a predator, I wouldn't be making sure she was safe and sound every chance I got. When she tried to drown herself after that fight with Lexi, I checked on Mackenzie, not Alexis, and Bobbi is my witness to that. You have my silence; nothing we discuss will leave this table."
Sid grabbed the document and looked it over, then slid it to Dana, who quickly signed it as a witness. Sid waved for Dana to leave them and she dutifully did, but not before giving Jamilyn the stink eye. With the paperwork out of the way, Sid dropped all pretenses. “My daughter is a very sick girl…not sick physically…but mentally. She always has been…from the moment I birthed her I knew something was off.” She lowered her head, “I drank…I did drugs…I didn’t care about anything while I carried her. The only reason I didn’t abort her was because of her father…”
Sid realized that she said too much on that count. Kenzi had no idea that her mother knew exactly who her father was, and what was more, he was alive and kicking. She quickly moved on, not wanting to further complicate things with this little tidbit of information. “Kenzi was a terrible child…just as I was a terrible mother. I couldn’t raise her…so I left her to my mother…I pretended that she wasn’t even mine. She was a vicious and brutish little monster…too much for even my mother to handle on a regular basis.” Sid paused, pulling out a cigarette and lighting up, ignoring the ‘no smoking’ signs.
She took a long drag…composing herself before exhaling, “Kenzi fought…she hurt other children…she hurt them badly, to the point where she was forced into home schooling for a time. She broke things…she set fire to my mother’s house…four times. The last time she nearly burned her to death in her own bedroom.” Sid chuckled a bit, “Probably would have served her right.” She flicked away the ashes, “When she was 12, she was diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder. My mother nearly lost custody of her to the state…but she convinced me that we could salvage her…so…I tried my hand on being a real mother again. With a mixture of medications and techniques I learned to stabilize her moods…she began to improve. We thought the worst was over…until my career pulled me away again.”
Sid puffed away, trying to remember it all, “Kenzi got worse and worse…she severely injured a young boy in the neighborhood…beat him with a bat…she said that he was seeing other girls.” She snickered, but it was hollow, “She had met the boy only a few hours earlier.”
Sid finished and started to light another one. “I came back after a health scare…before that moment, I had every intention of letting her rot away in an institution…but I didn’t I brought her back…I again. I held her together…and she started to grow and flourish! Then…the accident happened…and Kenzi has slowly gotten worse. To be perfectly honest with you, I think that Alex Yin was lucky to have gotten on as well as she did…given Ken’s deteriorating state. She’s lucky that Hannah was the only causality. At least she was locked away in the relative safety of jail!”
Sid continued smoking and drinking, “So…now you come to me to tell me that you love my daughter…and I tell you in turn that she probably loves you as well…but it’s nothing like you think it will be. She’s dangerous…to herself…to the people you care about. Without me to keep her in check…she will hurt herself…or she’ll hurt you or someone else, given time. I need you to bring her home…so that I can help her before she’s too far gone…before she loses everything…before you lose everything…”
Jamilyn took all this information in. It made sense...except... "With all due respect, Miss Grey...Mackenzie doesn't seem near as out of control when she's around me compared to most people. When it's her and I alone, she's more rational, calmer...she doesn't overreact as quickly. She seems scared to open up to me because of Alex and Tina....but I know she desires to open up to me. It's just that when everyone else gets in the way, she starts flipping out again. I think...I might be able to help her too. Please...at least let me try...so you're not the only one who has this burden. I promise, I won't enable her, Miss Grey...if anything, I can be the woman who loves her enough to protect her and keep her safe. Far as I'm concerned, she can lose her shit on Alexis all she wants....but with your blessing...I at least want to be there for her when you can't be."
Sid considered what Jamilyn was offering, then crushed out the cigarette on the table, “A partnership then…you keep her out of trouble when I am unable to.” She eyed Jamilyn, then pointed at her, “I love my daughter, regardless of what she’s done and what you say. Believe me when I tell you this…when you hurt her…and I know that you will, you’ll answer to me…and to all of my girls…do you understand?”
Despite the fact that she asked a question, she didn’t bother to stick around for the answer. Instead, she signaled for the O’Connell’s to come over and they promptly gave Jamilyn the finger, then proceeded to wheel Sidney Grey out of the restaurant, leaving her with the check.
Fortunately for me...I had not be privy to that conversation...but I would be...soon enough. Instead filling my head with knowledge about other people, I was filling my gut with what was left of Tina's booze. I got ripped to the gills and I left the house...tweeting to world about how drunk I was as I drove Tina's car...
YOLO
I drove her car right into a fire hydrant.
UH OH
I was a complete mess...but at least I had a guardian angel to watch over me...
LATER THAT NIGHT
Jami pulls up to the car and leans out to talk to Kenzi. “Mackenzie, are you okay?”
Ken drunkenly staggers over and falls against the side of the car, trying to look sexy, but failing. “My hero...but I imagined you more naked...” Ken falls to the ground in a heap on the pavement.
Jami steps out in a tight black leather miniskirt, a purple tube top, and silver heels. “Come on, honey...do you know what city you're in?” She tries to answer, then pukes everywhere. She heaves violently, unable to breathe as she struggles against her convulsions. Jami rubs her back and soothes her. “It's okay, Caramel. I'll get you someplace safe. Come on...you can puke all you want in my car...it's a rental, it's had worse happen to it.”
Jami sees a couple of tweets from Dani Chow on her phone. “Your mom's lawyer....who do you feel safer with, honey...me or them? Where are they right now, anyway?” Kenzi can only shake her head before she seemingly passes out. Jami carries Kenzi to her car and buckles her up.
(HALF AN HOUR LATER)
Jami carries Kenzi into her place and to one of the guest rooms. She lays Kenzi down and sits on the bed with her. “Mackenzie...this is all my fault...I'm so sorry, sweetie...” She caresses Kenzi's face. “I'm not leaving your side, honey....not until you're awake and feeling better.” Kenzi doesn't move, just doses quietly.
Against her better instinct, Jami leans down and kisses Kenzi's lips gently. “I love you, Mackenzie...please...forgive me for what happened earlier today...at least now you don't have to worry about being jealous of Alexis anymore...”
(EARLY TUESDAY MORNING)
True to her word, Jami has not left Kenzi's side while she was passed out. In fact, she's not even been to sleep herself. She's still sitting on the bed with Kenzi, stroking her hair and face, having not changed from her clothes and only having left for the bathroom and the occasional food or drink item, in this case a caramel blended coffee.
Kenzi awoke, instantly feeling ashamed for her actions, despite not remembering most of what happened. She knew it had been shameful, all the same. She was a mess and felt filthy...and the embarrassment from that made her what to disappear. Seeing Jamilyn there, beside her, holding her hand...likely through the night made her feel like cutting her own throat. She must have seemed like the world's biggest tool at the moment. Kenzi sat up...looking Jamilyn in the eye, then she scrambled off the bed, grabbing her bag as she bolted to what she hoped was the bathroom, slamming to door and locking it behind her. She couldn't face her...not like this.
Jami sighed and knocked on the door. “Mackenzie...you're in my cosplay closet...please, come out. We need to talk...”
Kenzi looked around and saw all the costumes, then felt like a bigger idiot. She wanted to come out and talk face to face, but embarrassment held her in place. It seemed juvenile to text...but it felt safer…
Kenzi Grey Text: OMG!! WHAT HAPPENED? WHAT DID I DO? WHAT DID WE DO?!
Jami understood to a degree and replied back, making sure to be as sweet as she could. She wanted to talk to Kenzi face to face as well...
Jamilyn Cornett Text: I did kiss your lips lightly one time, but that was it. We never went any further, because I love and respect you, and I'm not about to take advantage of a woman.
Kenzi appreciated that, though a part of her was slightly disappointed that more hadn't happened. At that moment her thoughts turned to Tina, and what she must be thinking right now.
Kenzi Grey Text: Okay…I’m coming out of the closet…
As Jami saw her text about coming out of the closet, she didn't do the standard joke that everyone else was expecting....rather, she meant to encourage her by offering some of her cosplays to help Kenzi feel more at home.
Jamilyn Cornett Text: It's okay, sweetheart. Take your time.
Kenzi came out, looking like a whipped puppy. “Sorry...this isn't what I wanted. I just got out of control...” She started to go to Jamilyn and put her arms around her, but thoughts of Tina kept her from doing that. “Could you just take me home?”
Jami walked up to her and up her arms around Kenzi's waist. “I will in a moment. We need to talk...and I need to apologize to you.” Jami sighed heavily. “I wasn't exactly honest with you about how Lexi found out about what you told me...I wasn't telling her anything. She started going through my phone yesterday while I was in the bathroom and found our conversation. I should have tried to warn you as soon as I could, but she threw the phone and started hitting me the second I tried to explain.”
Kenzi frowned. “What the fuck do you mean, she hit you?!” Kenzi was instantly filled with rage, as if a switch had been thrown. “I'LL KILL THAT BITCH!!! WHAT DID SHE DO? WHERE THE FUCK IS SHE?!!!”
Jami's eyes widened as if she was seeing something happen for the first time. “Mackenzie, please...” Jami brought her hand to Kenzi's face, speaking softly. “You'll get your chance to pay her back in spades, I promise. Besides...it was worth it....because I realized how right you were about everything.” Jami takes a deep breath, sighing in content. “I also talked to your mom last night...she told me everything, honey.”
Kenzi's eyes grew wide at the mention of her mother. The anger was now mingled with confusion. “WHAT?! WHAT ARE YOU SAYING?!!”
“I know why you've been so easy to upset with everyone else...and I can handle it. And I know why you act differently with me than you do everyone else.” Jami looks into Kenzi's dark eyes. “Mackenzie...I told your mom how I felt about you...and she's given me her approval, if tentatively...”
Kenzi stumbled back, pushing her away. She looked completely in tatters, unsure of what was up or down. “I have to go...I want to go...NOW! TAKE ME BACK TO TINA'S!!”
Jami stands before Kenzi, on the verge of tears. She expected a better response than this. “As you wish, Michaela...just...give me a chance to change first....” Jami turns and begins to gather more conservative clothes compared to the skirt and top she was still wearing from the night before.
Kenzi was a wreck, she had no idea what to think or feel. She had run from her mother and now Jamilyn was throwing in with her? Her feelings for Jamilyn made this even more confusing to her. What was happening?
Suddenly, Jami stopped. She turned around and put her hands on her hips, having forgotten that she'd stripped down to her strapless bra and boycut panties, both purple in color. “No...something else is off here. You didn't panic until I mentioned your mom...is there something I need to know about, Mackenzie? Something I need to protect you from?”
Kenzi stared at her. “...you, apparently! If you won't take me...I'll walk...or take a cab!!”
Jami tilted her head. “Look, Mackenzie, I'm on your side here. And from the way AJ and Megan are talking, there's a lot more going on here than I'm aware of. I want to make sure you're safe and sound, but I can't do that if I don't know what the deal is between you and your mom. Please...you can trust me...I want to help you.” Jami sighed. “I only talked to your mom because if I didn't, they were going to threaten legal action to get you back home, and I couldn't risk that, not in the condition you were in. Please....you know I wouldn't intentionally do anything to hurt you, Mackenzie...” Jami slowly stepped forward, her near-nude body swaying as she did, and caressed Kenzi's cheek. “I love you, sweetie...I'd do anything to protect you. Please...I need to know what's going on, babygirl.”
Ordinarily, she would have relished the visual, but there was just too much going on at the moment. She fell into Jamilyn's arms and held her tightly. “I just need time to think...I can't do that with you here. I need time...just a little more time.” She leaned up and kissed her cheek lightly, resisting the urge to go further until she figured out what was going on.
“Fair enough...and thank you.” Jami looked upon Kenzi with a smile. “You're showing that you care more about me as a person than an object. Any other girl would have already had her hand in my panties....but you're different...in a good way.” Jami leaned down and kissed Kenzi's lips tenderly.
Kenzi nearly pulled away as thoughts of hurting Tina came to mind, but she accepted for as long as she could and then slowly pulled away as her body threatened to betray her good sense. “We'll talk more...after I clear my head and...and make amends for being a little shit. Thank you Jamilyn...for not taking advantage last night...or right now. I couldn't forgive myself...”
“You're not the only one who needs to clear their head, honey. If you ever need me, let me know. I'll be there as soon as I can.” Jami responded.
Kenzi sighed, “I feel like I always need you, but I need to get my house in order first...and so do you!” Her thoughts turned back to Alexis and her mood grew visibly darker. “Especially Blake...”
Jami nodded. “At least we both agree on that.” Jami went back to her clothes and began to put on her outfit for the day. “Honestly...I think I need to be single for a while anyway. Much as I think Tina enables some of your riskier behavior at times, I can't exactly expect you to leave her and come to me...”
She flinched at the mention of Tina...and Jamilyn's thoughts on being single. It felt like a missed opportunity, but the timing was wrong...and feelings were involved and raw on all sides. Kenzi only nodded her head, turning away and wrapping her arms around herself. “I'm ready to go, as soon as you are...”
(A FEW HOURS LATER)
Jami walks up to the mailbox at home and finds a mysterious looking package in it. She walks into the house and heads straight up to her bedroom. She opens the box and her eyes open wide. “Son of a bitch...she actually did it!” She pulled out at note and read it…
“I just wanted you to see that you have an affect on me that I can't fight or understand. I don't know if it's love or just sex...a bit of both...or maybe neither. My brain keeps telling me not to do this...but the devil on my shoulder keeps screaming "FUCK IT!"
Sorry... ♡♡♡”
Jami picks up the small pair of panties that was included in the box and sniffs them. Ooooh yeah, she was hooked now.
Jamilyn Cornett Text: You actually did it...I'm sniffing them right now....you have an amazing scent, my caramel delight. <3
Kenzi Grey Text: I'm totally freaking out now...I don't know what's wrong with me!
Jamilyn Cornett Text: Calm down...you don't need to freak out with me...is it because I'm acknowledging what I have in my hands? Or is it something else, babygirl?
Kenzi Grey Text: I DON'T KNOW!!! I like it...but I'm scared
Jamilyn Cornett Text: Scared of what, angel?
Kenzi Grey Text: I committed to Tina...and she needs me...I don't want to hurt her...
Jamilyn Cornett Text: ....but your feelings for me are overpowering what you feel for Tina, huh? Let me ask this...do you feel the same way for me that you do for Tina?
I'm sorry...that was a stupid thing to ask. I should be happy you were even interested in a cum-dumpster like me to begin with. U__U
I'm sorry...that was a stupid thing to ask. I should be happy you were even interested in a cum-dumpster like me to begin with. U__U
Kenzi Grey Text: It's different...and don't say that about yourself! There's different was to express how we feel. I have to figure this out...all of it. Please be patient with me...this is all so new...
Jamilyn Cornett Text: I'm sorry...I'm dealing with so much shit right now I can barely think straight...AJ's supposed to be taking me out to Jersey...
Kenzi Grey Text: Talk to you soon! I have some talking of my own to do I guess...
Jamilyn Cornett Text: Mackenzie...thank you. For sticking up for me against Lexi...you have no idea how much I appreciated that.
Kenzi Grey Text: Don't thank me...that big foot bitch has it coming! What did you see in her anyway?
She has a big flat ass!!!
She has a big flat ass!!!
Jamilyn Cornett Text: She does, doesn't she? *giggle* But...I think I could be more than satisfied with the caramel curves of your body. I hope I didn't cause you too much duress when I was only in my bra and panties in front of you...
Kenzi Grey Text: I'm still thinking about it...I can't stop.
Jamilyn Cornett Text: Did I look...cute?
Kenzi Grey Text: You'd look cute in a garbage bag to me...but it's not just that...it's the sound of your voice...the smell of you....it's everything. Yeah...you were very cute...
Jamilyn Cornett Text: #blush Then it isn't just physical with you then....you're attracted to me on an emotional level too....otherwise your reaction would have been more on the lines of calling me sexy or fuckable...*giggle*
That means a lot to me, Caramel. You wanna guess what I'm doing right now? Or would you rather I show you?
That means a lot to me, Caramel. You wanna guess what I'm doing right now? Or would you rather I show you?
Kenzi Grey Text: You know what...I see you when I close my eyes...I like it when you tell me...
Jamilyn Cornett Text: I'm laying down on my bed, your panties in my face....the erotic smell of you filling my nostrils...as I pleasure myself to the memory of how you kissed me for the first time...the way your dress clung to your body....the way your soft lips felt against mine...the moment I knew I was in love with you. I haven't been able to stop myself from replaying that memory in my mind every chance I can. And every time we've talked since, my feelings for you have only grown.
Kenzi Grey Text: I wish I could be there...just to lay there beside you...to listen to you breathe... ...GOD...I need to figure this out... Tina needs me...but maybe she's not what I need...but what happens to her?
Am I a piece of shit for caring more about what I want than her? I could be with you right now...but what happens then, what does that make me?
Am I a piece of shit for caring more about what I want than her? I could be with you right now...but what happens then, what does that make me?
Jamilyn Cornett Text: If you were to come to me and claim me (not anytime soon, I'm heading to Jersey with AJ tonight), I'd be completely yours. I would stop seeing all my other girls and dedicate myself to you. That's how much I care about you....I'm willing to sacrifice part of myself if it makes you happy.
Tina, by comparison, has not been the greatest of influences on you. She's encouraged more of your riskier actions than has been needed. I've been trying to show you how much I care by being your reason when you start to get too emotional about things. What do you feel when you're with me?
Tina, by comparison, has not been the greatest of influences on you. She's encouraged more of your riskier actions than has been needed. I've been trying to show you how much I care by being your reason when you start to get too emotional about things. What do you feel when you're with me?
Kenzi Grey Text: I feel calm...I feel settled...
I have a confession...Tina tried to stop me from drinking...but I didn't listen and I tried to force her to drink...even when I knew it might hurt her...
She's better than me...I just wanted you to know that.
I have a confession...Tina tried to stop me from drinking...but I didn't listen and I tried to force her to drink...even when I knew it might hurt her...
She's better than me...I just wanted you to know that.
Jamilyn Cornett Text: And yet she wasn't the one that showed up when you needed someone the most, was she? Who do you see more of when you close your eyes? Who does your heart ache to be with more? May I ask what you're doing right now, baby?
Kenzi Grey Text: You want me to say it...or you need me to?
Jamilyn Cornett Text: I need you to, Mackenzie...
Kenzi Grey Text: Sitting in the bathroom with the door locked. Been here for an hour...hiding...thinking...about you...about us... I want to be with you...but I'm scared. I don't want to hurt anyone...especially you!
Jamilyn Cornett Text: You won't hurt me, Mackenzie. I won't let that happen. And you've had plenty of opportunities to hurt me, babygirl. The one time you did, it was a complete accident, and I never held it against you. I still came to make sure YOU were okay after Bobbi carried you out of the bathroom.
Kenzi Grey Text: I don't want to talk to Tina...I don't want to hurt her. I feel so goddamn selfish!
Jamilyn Cornett Text: I know, babygirl.....but you may not have an option. Besides....how often have you been the selfless one? Sacrificing for the better of others?
Kenzi Grey Text: LOL HARDLY EVER! I'm so fucking selfish!!
Jamilyn Cornett Text: ....when you said you were in the bathroom hiding...what are you wearing right now?
Kenzi Grey Text: I don't want to be like that with you...but I know it's selfish of me...
DON'T START THIS! I'M TRYING TO BE GOOD!
DON'T START THIS! I'M TRYING TO BE GOOD!
Jamilyn Cornett Text: *giggling* Babygirl, you know what I've been doing this whole time.... So normally you're a selfish person EXCEPT with me....which means you're already being a better person being around me. Do you still feel selfish with Tina?
Kenzi Grey Text: I'm not wearing anything....I'm sitting on the edge of the tub...thinking about you...touching me...
....driving me crazy.... Making me scream...digging my fingers in your hair...pulling you deeper...
OKAY! FUCK YOU, NO MORE!!! I'm shaking....all over...but I'm crying too... Someone is going to get hurt...I'd rather it was just me...
....driving me crazy.... Making me scream...digging my fingers in your hair...pulling you deeper...
OKAY! FUCK YOU, NO MORE!!! I'm shaking....all over...but I'm crying too... Someone is going to get hurt...I'd rather it was just me...
Jamilyn Cornett Text: Mackenzie....if we're attracted to each other, there's no shame in what you're doing. It's perfectly natural. And neither of us will get hurt....I promise.
I....I want to see you. You've got me so close, babygirl....I just...need something....to drive me over the edge...even if it's a picture of you as you are right now....my gorgeous Mackenzie....
I....I want to see you. You've got me so close, babygirl....I just...need something....to drive me over the edge...even if it's a picture of you as you are right now....my gorgeous Mackenzie....
Kenzi Grey Text: *Image Sent*
Greedy...GOOD NIGHT!
Greedy...GOOD NIGHT!
Jamilyn Cornett Text: Only for you, my sweet caramel....thank you very much. And...please be safe with Tina....something about this new bodyguard and her talking about 'brainwashing'....I'm getting very scared for your safety.
If you need me to do anything for you....anything at all…you call or text immediately, okay? I promise, I'll get there as soon as I can. ...I love you, Mackenzie...*kiss*
If you need me to do anything for you....anything at all…you call or text immediately, okay? I promise, I'll get there as soon as I can. ...I love you, Mackenzie...*kiss*
22 June 2016
LAS VEGAS, NV
Things were getting hot and heavy between us...with Tina now in Rehab and me pretty much a prisoner in her home while her armor clad Amazon, Nicole watched over me. I was feeling terrible about possibly betraying Tina...though I viewed her leaving me as a betrayal of a sort. I was so confused...but thoughts of Jamilyn always made things clearer.
I thought about her...and so she reached out to me in answer, so it seemed...
Jamilyn Cornett Text: Mackenzie....I can't believe I just did this... I just called out your name when Kate and I were doing it. #blush
Kenzi Grey Text: Not sure whether to be flattered or upset... :/
Jamilyn Cornett Text: Please....flattered...because I've had you in my mind all night. I can't deny it anymore, Mackenzie...I need you.
Kenzi Grey Text: But you're with someone else...I guess I am too...but it's different...
...so confusing...
...so confusing...
Jamilyn Cornett Text: Not anymore. Last night got me thrown out. I'm not with anyone anymore.
Kenzi Grey Text: I feel like all of this is my fault... You were really happy before you met me!
Jamilyn Cornett Text: No....that's just it. There's something no one ever knew about me...something you need to know in order for you to realize how much you've changed my life for the better. You remember that Mega man cup I had in my hand when you came over the first time?
Kenzi Grey Text: Honesty...I wasn't looking at the cup...
Jamilyn Cornett Text: I'd ask what you were looking at, but that would be a stupid question.
Kenzi Grey Text: Yes it would...
Jamilyn Cornett Text: Long story short, that cup would be a daily dose of a cocktail Juliana gave me all the time...a combination of Addyi, Geodon...and speed. Until you came by that day, I always had a cup of that in the morning, because Juliana fucked me up so much I thought it was the only way I could function. But once you kissed me...I knew I had to get off the stuff. I threw the mug away and haven't had any of that shit since.
Kenzi Grey Text: I HAD NO IDEA! What about Juliana...where are you with her?
Jamilyn Cornett Text: *shakes head* Juliana broke things off with me back in January because I refused to abandon my family and follow her ways....she got me so addicted to that stuff I was getting it myself and blending it into my coffee...no one knew anything about it because I always did it through single-serve K-cups. You're the first person I've ever told that.
Kenzi Grey Text: Thank you...I appreciate the honesty. I think I've made up my mind...I just need to have a heart to heart with someone first... I'll call you soon, okay? ♡♡♡
Jamilyn Cornett Text: Okay...I'll be waiting for you. ^__^
People use the term BOMBSHELL way too often. It loses a little something when you misuse it. I'm not misusing it. I got hit with a fucking bombshell!
I went to talk to Tina...to do the right thing before anything happened. I told Tina that I was going to leave...I had feelings for someone else...I had feelings for Jamilyn Cornett...
BOMBSHELL!!!!
Kenzi Grey Text: WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME ABOUT YOU AND TINA?!!!
Jamilyn Cornett Text: It was before I ever knew about her attraction to you or how you felt about me. By the time she made it known to me how she felt...I'm sorry, Mackenzie, I should have told you what was going on, but I never thought I ever had a chance with you. But when I was finally ready to tell you, she started acting weird, and I thought it best for everyone involved if I kept my mouth shut, since talking is usually what gets me in trouble to begin with.
Kenzi Grey Text: I TRUSTED YOU!! You could have told me...
Jamilyn Cornett Text: I swear to God, sweetie, if I knew anything about how Tina felt before we hooked up, I NEVER would have done anything with her. The second I realized how you felt for me, I stopped seeing her that way. And you're right, I should have told you, and I'm sorry. I promise, that is the only thing I have knowingly kept from you, but only because I was worried for the safety of both of us. I mean, have you SEEN the way Tina's been on Twitter lately?
Kenzi Grey Text: My chest hurts...I have to sign off...this is too much...
Jamilyn Cornett Text: Wait...if you never want to see me again, I totally understand and I would deserve it. If you do still want this to work, I'll do whatever I have to to make it up to you. But I need to know now before you sign off. Or would you rather I work things out with Kate? I need to know here...I'm so lost right now.
Kenzi Grey Text: I can't trust these messages...I feel like you're playing with me here! I have no idea what I want right now! I'm sick...FUCK!!!
Jamilyn Cornett Text: You're good for me...you may have saved my life with a kiss...remember?
Kenzi Grey Text: I need to think...
Jamilyn Cornett Text: I understand....I just hope you don't hate me. U__U
Kenzi Grey Text: Never...I hate myself right now. I knew better...
Jamilyn Cornett Text: Don't ever hate yourself, okay? I was on a terrible path before you kissed me that day. Because of you, I'm slowly powering through my addiction. I owe you more than I could ever explain, Mackenzie, and I love you.
Kenzi Grey Text: You think you do...
Jamilyn Cornett Text: Mac, any time you hurt, I hurt. And when I do something stupid that pains you....I want to pick at my old cutting scars so that my pain is worse than yours. I want to make you smile and keep you calm, not upset you like I have been doing.
Kenzi Grey Text: Don't do that...you're making it worse!!! I'll just blame myself...and rightly so...
Jamilyn Cornett Text: I'm sorry... I didn't mean I was literally doing it...but you get what I mean at least... Kate wants to sit down with the two of us once we get back to discuss what exactly will be going on between the three of us...I don't think she's gonna give me up as easily as I thought.
Kenzi Grey Text: The GM keeps saying make good decisions...so I don't want to rush this... If you can't wait...I understand...it will be just what I thought...I'm not enough for you... Not your fault...okay?
Jamilyn Cornett Text: Mackenzie....I just want you to know I'm here for you. <3
Kenzi Grey Text: It's your choice...just like I have to choose for me! Right now...I'm scared of you and Tina...for different reasons. I'm attracted to you, mind and body...but I can't keep getting hurt. I have no idea how to deal with my feelings...
I won't say 'I love you' because I have no idea what that means...but I want you...I probably need you...
I don't think you need me in the same way...you want me...you THINK you need me. Maybe I can't fulfill you...it just seems that way.
I won't say 'I love you' because I have no idea what that means...but I want you...I probably need you...
I don't think you need me in the same way...you want me...you THINK you need me. Maybe I can't fulfill you...it just seems that way.
I wasn't making good decisions...I was three sheets to the wind and all alone. I knew what I wanted...I just had no idea how badly I needed it. Alcohol gave me the courage to reach out to Jamilyn...and do something very, very stupid...
Kenzi Grey Text: I'm soooooo DRUNK! LOL
Jamilyn Cornett Text: Baby...why are you drinking?
Kenzi Grey Text: Because...people give me attention...I like it...
Jamilyn Cornett Text: You can have all my attention without drinking, my sweet Mackenzie. Please don't upset people tonight. I don't want you to lose your contract with LAW because of a drunken Twitter spree, do you?
Kenzi Grey Text: Fuck them...you left me...so did Tina... She left me with her big robot woman!
Jamilyn Cornett Text: You told me to go, babe....remember? I asked you if I should go with AJ, and you said to go.
Kenzi Grey Text: I DIDN'T! YOU LEFT ME!!!
Jamilyn Cornett Text: If I'd known this would happen, I wouldn't have. Can you find a way to Vegas? We just landed a few minutes ago.
Kenzi Grey Text: Shhhhhhhh...I think I'm kidnapped!
Jamilyn Cornett Text: Are you okay? What's going on, honey?
Kenzi Grey Text: I shouldn't have gotten mad...so what...you fucked Tina? She's cute...right?
Jamilyn Cornett Text: She is cute...but you're ten times the beauty she is.
Kenzi Grey Text: HAVE YOU SEEN HER ASS? Well...I guess you have...huh?
Jamilyn Cornett Text: I'd much rather have yours, Mackenzie. ~_^
Kenzi Grey Text: Did you have sex with her? How was it?
Jamilyn Cornett Text: It wasn't too bad....but she wasn't exactly what I would call responsive. She just kinda...laid there.
Kenzi Grey Text: Did you try sticking a finger up her ass?
Jamilyn Cornett Text: That got her to squirm a little bit...but I still wish it'd been you instead.
Kenzi Grey Text: Did she...you know...really hard? I think I would...
Jamilyn Cornett Text: I would love to see you do that babygirl...
Kenzi Grey Text: Does Kate taste good?
Jamilyn Cornett Text: Why are you talking about her?
Kenzi Grey Text: You're making me hot...I might have to make Tina's dog come in her and take care of me...what's her name? Don't remember...
Jamilyn Cornett Text: If you could find your way to Vegas, I'd take care of you myself. And yes, Kate does taste good. Kinda like vanilla, if you will.
Kenzi Grey Text: I think you're lying....is she there now?
Jamilyn Cornett Text: She is, but she's distracted. And what do you think I'm lying about, honey?
Kenzi Grey Text: Call me...leave your phone on...don't tell her...and make her do you while I listen...
Jami dials the phone and sets it down, and Kenzi can hear Jami's voice. She listens as the sounds of sex fill her ears. Kenzi sniffs a bit...and the line disconnects...
Jamilyn Cornett Text: WHY DID YOU DO THAT?!!!
Kenzi Grey Text: Do what? I can't stop crying... YOU HAD SEX WITH HER!!!
Jamilyn Cornett Text: You asked me to make her do it!
Kenzi Grey Text: You do everything I say?
Jamilyn Cornett Text: If I think it'd please you, yes.
Kenzi Grey Text: Come back tonight and make love to me...
Jamilyn Cornett Text: Really? You really want me to do that? I have a jet in Vegas, I can be back in LA in two hours....
Kenzi Grey Text: Come to Tina's place and screw me... Don't talk...just come in and take me...HARD...then leave...don't talk...don't kiss... Will you do that?
Jamilyn Cornett Text: Give me two hours, and I'll be there. I hope you're wearing a skirt....but can I get at least one kiss at the end? I'll obey the rest of what you say....just give me that concession, please.
Kenzi Grey Text: NO! No kissing! But when I'm done with you...get out! You hear me? Not a word...NOTHING!
Jamilyn Cornett Text: ....done.
Kenzi Grey Text: The key is under the plant by the door...
And don't touch yourself...only me...I don't want you to have anything for yourself...
Just watch me...
I'm going to bed now...see you in 2 hours...
And don't touch yourself...only me...I don't want you to have anything for yourself...
Just watch me...
I'm going to bed now...see you in 2 hours...
Jamilyn Cornett Text: Only you get yours. Understood.
Kenzi Grey Text: It better be good...it better be the best! If it isn’t...I'm never talking to you again...NEVER!!!
I bet you think you're good, huh? You think you can make me fall in love with you, huh?
I bet you think you're good, huh? You think you can make me fall in love with you, huh?
I am going to spare you all the gory details...just like I spared you all from the way harsher and more graphic language and images that were shared between Jamilyn Cornett and I. As a concession...I will grant you this...
True to her word, Jamilyn came back to Los Angeles...leaving her friends Cali-Kate and Amy Jo Smyth to wonder where she was off to. She came back and she did exactly as I asked her to do. When it was all said and done...she waited for me to concede and allow her to kiss me...but I did not...even though, I really wanted her to.
Jamilyn needed to put her house in order before we could do anything more...she needed to address this with Cali-Kate...the last of her so called 'herd.' I won't lie to you and tell you that there wasn't more that took place between us afterwards...a lot more happened...
A LOT
But...not before the 'herd' was finally reduced to zero. There still needed to be that final assurance...and that was to come at LAW 49...a meeting between me, Jamilyn, and Cali-Kate to settle up and move our relationship in whatever direction it was bound to head after that. I could hardly wait...
Of course...this entire time...I had all but ignored Mindy De Santiago...my opponent for Queen of the ring. I'm sure she hasn't ignored me...but what more can I say? She wants to be Queen of the Ring...and me...I just want to be happy...
Tomorrow...we were going to find out who got exactly what they wanted...