Post by USA on Sept 4, 2014 19:32:07 GMT -5
LAW 13 marks my return to action after being injured at the hands of Sidney Grey and Summer St. Clair…a pair of women that I am developing a very low tolerance for, but more on them later. I am excited to be in this match, not only because I am going to have an opportunity to test my metal against the newly crowned LAW Champion and the Queen of the Ring…but more importantly, I finally reunite with my sister Nyako inside the squared circle. For me…this is a dream come true…and even more than that, this is an opportunity for me to show her the woman that I have become.
My past is a patchwork of horrors…most of which are of my own making, but in recent weeks I have seen that there is a better way to live my life. I can fight for something good instead of surrounding myself with the bad. There was a time in my life where I would have relished this upcoming match, not because The Doc and Evelyn Taylor were the top talent that LAW had to offer, but because this match represented the opportunity to showcase the superiority of my people and my klan. I would have decimated them…humiliated them…done all that I could to inflict pain upon them and make them bleed fountains of blood. All of these things I would have done with a smile on my face…and emptiness in my heart.
Evelyn Taylor showed a great deal of honor and fortitude when she emerged victorious in the Queen of the Ring tournament…even managing to defeat my sister in a one on own match. I know Nyako’s skill and her passion for combat, so Taylor is obviously a forced to be reckoned with in her own right. I relish the chance to step inside the ring with her and test my skill and passion against her own. I do this, not for any ideas of vengeance against the woman…but for the sake of matching my skill against the best that LAW has to offer.
The fact that she is from humble beginnings and has fought and clawed her way to the top is a testament to the woman that she is. She is to be admired for that…and I give her all of my respect in that regard. She certainly does display all of the best values that are to be cherished and respected in this business of ours…however, complements aside, inside the ring…this is where she must earn my respect. I do not give it lightly and very few have earned it. Gabriella Camacho earned my respect inside the ring…and it did not come easily. I promise Taylor the same. If she plans to roll over me…she will be sorely disappointed. If she plans to intimidate me with her newly won accolade…she will be sorely disappointed. If she plans to fight me with everything that she has…if she is willing to bleed inside the ring in order to achieve victory…in this, she and I will have MUCH in common.
She may be Queen of the Ring…having earned victory over my sister on her way to that achievement, but when she faces me…those past deeds will be meaningless. She will have to fight me tooth and nail in order to survive that match. To achieve victory…she will have to be willing to give up much more than that. I hope that she has that kind of desire in her heart…I want to feel it for myself. Win or lose…I will gladly call her Queen if she comes to LAW 13 ready to put everything she has on the line.
As for The Doc…I honestly have no words. Truly, she is the LAW Champion and she earned that title on her own. Many people will say that I should give her my respect simply for that very reason, but I disagree. Deeds and accomplishments are but a single part of the equation. Strength of character and honor are to be considered as well. I cannot guess to know what a woman like The Doc thinks…I can only listen to the words that she speaks, and to be honest, she is a woman of very few words…or perhaps those words are reserved for those that she deems worthy.
My sister holds the distinction of being the sole black mark upon her otherwise flawless singles record. Despite the unfortunately dubious nature of Nyako’s victory and her desire to fight The Doc again, as to leave no doubt about her superiority…the woman could not be troubled to spare her precious breath. How else is one to take her lack of care or interest? Frankly, I find it offensive and cowardly…a fact that I intend to make well known when I get the opportunity to lay my hands on her inside the ring. I hope that she is in fact a woman of action…because if she is not, the punishment I dish out to her will not only tarnish her legacy of champion…but will leave little doubt to anyone watching that the wrong woman won in the main event at Queen of the Ring.
Perhaps I should be wary of The Doc…for no other reason that the fact that in her previous profession she made it her life’s work to evaluate the mentally unbalanced. Being in such close quarters…would she see my true nature? Would she be able to peel back the layers and know that a sickness inhabits me? I sincerely hope that she in fact she does not, because I fear what It would do should it ever be exposed to the harsh light of day. To run free…ripping and tearing…hurting whomever It will…doing the unspeakable for the sake of inflicting pain.
In this, I must be honest…at least with myself…a part of me desires this. My inner demon is never far from the surface and It always speaks to me in whispers…willing me to do horrifying things…goading me on. Very rarely do I listen to It…because most times I know that It only seeks to do harm and commit great acts of chaos and violence. It finds amusement in the suffering of the innocent and the fear in those that are victimized. In my time…I have hurt people without remorse, both friend and foe alike. It pleased me to do so…or perhaps rather that pleased It…
I call this need…this inner voice “It” in order to separate It from myself, or rather the person that I most desire to be. Perhaps I am simply insane…and this thought truly does terrify me. To think that at any moment I could be consumed by this other half of myself and go on a rampage against those I hold dear. My sister has not been immune to this in the past…and I feel that on some level It desires her in an unnatural way…if only to alienate her from me…to hurt her…to drive her away and have me all to Itself.
I will not let that happen…I will not allow myself to be consumed. I am master of the thing that threatens to devour me and those I hold dear. I will be the person I was always meant to be…a woman of honor, conviction, and worth. From this day forward…the woman I once was is no more. My moniker…Oni…stands as a stark reminder of what I once was…and what I will never become again. LAW 13 will be a testament to the promise that I have made to myself.
I will not seek vengeance against women the likes of Sidney Grey and Summer St. Clair, though the darkness inside me screams for it. I know what dwells in the hearts of people like them, because it lives inside me…and I will use this knowledge against them and their kind. If they are looking for a fight…they should pray that they find me between the ropes…should we meet outside of them, they will surely regret it.
I could easily turn my back on Grey and St. Clair, were it not for the ties that my little sister…and my new business manager SoLo has with CTN. Her years long association with Grey and her friendship with the woman’s daughter, Kenzi have complicated an otherwise already delicate and difficult problem. SoLo’s sense of honor demanded that she do all that she could to help Grey…to do what she could to save her television show and what remained of her in-ring career. The fact that Grey is a vile and detestable person not only sullies my sister’s reputation…but it puts her in very real danger. I could not stand idly by and watch…nor could I demand that SoLo turn her back on her promise. I did the only thing I could to protect my new sister and defend her honor…I asked SoLo to be my business manager as well.
Nyako doesn’t agree with my solution…she thinks that it is a horrible idea. I know that she is right…but it is the best solution I have. So long as SoLo must be within five feet of Grey…I will be no farther than five feet from my sister. I don’t care about the things that concern Grey…titles and retribution…whining and complaining about the Queen of the Ring. I care about blood…and I care about honor…and I will protect my blood and I will protect the honor of my blood!
This weekend I return to action inside the confines of LAW…but it won’t be for fun and games. Sidney Grey and Summer St. Clair have had their fun, but their free passes are done! The Doc and Evie Taylor are the challenge that stands before me, and I am eager to meet it! This weekend, I put LAW and everyone in it on notice. Oni Kymiku is no one’s fool and no one’s stepping-stone. Anyone who doubts my resolve will be sorry…and that is a promise!
NYAKO'S APARTMENT
New York City, New York
4 September 2014
It felt so good to be out of the hospital and back with my sisters. We had literally spent our every waking moment together since my release. We saw the sights, went to see movies, shopping…everything that we could possibly imagine. We laughed and talked and laughed some more…all three of us…sisters. The rest of the world had fallen away and I didn’t concern myself with worry over any of it. The trouble with Sidney Grey had only come up once, while we were watching 101 Dalmatians…Ny remarked how much Cruella DeVille reminded her of Grey and that sent us all into hysterical laughter for the remainder of the movie…I’m not even sure that we finished it.
After a night on the town, we had all decided to crash at Ny’s apartment. We stayed up late; eating junk food, watching crappy television shows, and fixing each other’s hair and nails…and doing a really piss poor job of it. It was the best night ever…I really can’t remember ever being happier. Is this what it was like for everyone else? Is this how life was for people who didn’t have to worry about a horrible past threatening to devour them whole and destroy everything they loved? God…I love this!
I hadn’t felt this good in a very long time…but like always, my good feelings never last very long at all. The closer we got to LAW #13 the more I could feel it growing inside me. As I readied myself for my second foray into the ring in what was sure to be a highly competitive match against the LAW Champion and its new #1 Contender, all I could think about was the excitement of it all. That rush was amazing and I know that we all felt it. It thrilled me…but the other half of me was even more eager to show itself. It only cared for the pain I would mete out and that which I would experience.
The darkness inside me has little regard for my happiness, because It has needs of its own. Though I try to repress It, I know that sooner or later It always finds a way to sate It’s hunger. The trick for me is to feed It’s need in private before it became too great and manifested Itself publically.
So, in the early morning hours…I find myself locked away in my sister’s tiny bathroom and standing face to face with myself in a mirror…blood streaming from my left hand…razor in my right. I know that this is hardly good enough for the demon that dwells inside me…but it is all that I have to offer It at the moment…
…you’re such a fucking cock tease Kymiku…this should be Doc’s blood or Evelyn Taylor’s…hell, why not even Nyako or Song…come on…they are right there; hurt someone…it will make us both feel better…
I actually pull open the door and peek out. I see SoLo wrapped in the blanket Ny had given her as she dozed quietly on the recliner. Her hair was still a tangled mess from when Ny and I had tried to spike her hair like a punk rocker. The results had not been impressive, but the laughter had been riotous. Not even our best attempts to dirty up her appearance could diminish the innocence of her appearance.
Before I knew it…I was standing over her…razor in one hand…blood dripping from the other. Before I knew what I was going to do the blanket pulled away from her body. She murmured in her sleep and moved only slightly as the warmth of the cover left her. My eyes roamed slowly over her very slight frame…her curves were few and very subtle, but they were pleasing all the same…
…what are you going to do…cut her or fuck her; you better pick one fast Kymiku…
Before I knew what I was doing I watched as a single drop of blood fell from my hand and landed on the band of her white cotton panties…standing out in sharp contrast with its deep red hue. I quickly came to my senses and before I knew it, I was back in the bathroom…pulling the door shut, not bothering to fiddle with the noisy knob that would rattle noisily. I was back in front of the mirror, staring…
…when did you get so fucking weak; you shouldn’t be cutting your hand…you should be cutting your own throat…
I close my eyes as I put the razor against my hand again…drawing it slowly across my skin. I hardly flinch at the pain…I don’t feel it, not like others…I only feel the bad thoughts slipping away. I imagine them flowing out of me like the blood that courses between my fingers…dripping into the sink…flowing down the drain. This isn’t what I want…what It truly wants…but it is all I have to give, for now…
…for now…
“Oni, I’m sorry I…”
My eyes snap open as I hear the door suddenly open…then I remember the broken lock on the bathroom door of my sister’s tiny apartment. I quickly shove my hand under the faucet as I struggle to turn on the water, but I can already see that I’m too late.
“OH MY GOD!” SoLo rushes over, grabbing my hand, concern on her face for my welfare. Though she is tiny in her own right, even she has trouble getting to me within the confines of the compact space. “Your hand! Did you…”
“No! I’m fine Song…it’s just a small cut…I was…” I try my best to explain away what I already sense that she knows.
Her eyes meet mine, with more than just concern coloring her cheeks…I see true horror there. “Are you trying to kill yourself?”
I reach past her and push the door closed, standing over her as I do. “No, Song…that’s not what this is.” I can’t help but roll my eyes. “No one kills themselves by cutting their hands.”
She grabs my hand and roughly sticks it under the running water, not at all impressed by my observation. “I don’t understand…you did this on purpose! What’s going on here?”
“It was an accident.” I try to lie, but it hardly even sounds convincing to me. Not even horny adolescent boys think of shaving their hairy palms.
She turns my hand over and stares at the twin cuts…and then at a host of others in various degrees of healing. She stares at me incredulously, “You’re really accident prone.” She shakes her head, then turns and opens the door. “I’m going to talk to Ny about this…”
I grab her and slam the door shut, turning her to face me. “Song…do not include our sister in this!”
“You’re hurting yourself! I’m not going to stand by and watch…” she stared at me. “You might only be cutting your hands for now…but what happens when you decide to cut a little higher…a little deeper?”
I sighed, “I have no intention of killing myself…”
…you should…
She pulled up her sleeves, her eyes never leaving mine. “Neither did I.”
I looked down and saw the cuts on her arms…faint as they were, I could see them clearly. They were not the cuts of someone looking for attention…they were serious and well placed. The cuts ran along both forearms…and they ran long and deep. My eyes met hers and I could see that she understood better than I knew. I searched for the right words to say…but only one could come to mind; “Why…?”
She hesitated, but it was only for a moment…nearly imperceptible. She took my hand and held it up. “Only if you promise to tell me about this…”
…blackmailing little cunt…she’s beginning to grow on me Kymiku, careful with this one, with the right push, we could make something of her…
My hesitation was longer…a blind man could have seen it. “Song…I…”
“You promise to tell me why you do this…otherwise…” she didn’t finish her statement, but I didn’t need her to. I knew what she meant…
…don’t you dare make that promise…throw her down and give her what she’s really asking for…you know what I mean…
…I paused for so long that I knew she didn’t think I would relent…and perhaps in the end, who could say. I nodded, ever so slightly.
SoLo, holding my hand, took me back to the sink and ran more water over the wounds to clean them. “When Nyako left me…ran away from my family…I was devastated. I couldn’t understand why she would do that…why she would leave me. I idolized her…I wanted to be like her…she was everything, my entire world revolved around her.” She looked at me earnestly, “I know that sounds crazy…”
I shook my head. It didn’t sound crazy to me…I knew Nyako, but even more importantly, I knew crazy.
She nodded, continuing on. “I ran away myself…I acted out however I could; drinking, smoking, stealing…thinking that I could find Nyako or that she would come back if she heard the kind of trouble I was getting into.” She was quiet for a moment and I could see that she was reliving a terrible memory…one that I could tell would not be part of this tale. She let out a shuttering breath and I could see the corners of her mouth turning downward into a severe frown. When she spoke again…her voice was small…so small that I had to strain to hear it. “…she didn’t come back…not even after…I…” She took one hand and wiped at her cheeks. Her story continued, but she moved past whatever memory had given her so much pain. “I didn’t know what I had done to drive her away…I didn’t know why she hated me…why she hated my family.”
I stroked her hair with my free hand, hoping to chase away the horrible memories, but no one knew better than I did that such thoughts never left you. You could run until your feet bled or until the seas boiled…in the end, it was always a part of you.
She continued. “I was hurt…but that hurt turned into something else. It was anger…it was rage…it was hopelessness. All of those things and more, rolled into one. She was a part of me…a part of our family and she was just gone…just like that! My mother and father were devastated…so much so that they didn’t see me or what I did…didn’t seem to care. When I ran off…the always found me and brought me back, but…it was Ny that pained them the most.” She turned off the water and dried my palm, continuing to clean and dress my wound. “I know now that it wasn’t what I thought…but at the time, it was all that I knew. I thought that everything would be better for them once I was gone…they wouldn’t miss me…and maybe Ny would come back.”
She put the finishing touches on the bandages, “It started so small…and then…it all ended so big.” The look in her eyes was so far away that I wondered if she was really still there with me. “My mother found me there…lying in a bloody tub of hot water. I was almost gone…another few minutes…maybe less.”
“Song…I’m sorry.” that was all I could say, because I had no other words.
She tried to manage a small smile as she touched the side of my face. “It’s okay…it wasn’t your fault. My recovery lasted months…the therapy lasted years…” She stopped again, “…but you never really come all the way back. Not from that…”
I wanted to vomit into the sink as the sick feeling inside me caused my stomach to drop. I was the cause of this…I was responsible. Nyako had run away from a good home…had run away from her family because she feared what I had become…feared what I would do to her adoptive family. My ties to the Yakuza ran deep…but my obsession with my sister was even deeper. What would I have done had I known about them? Maybe nothing…maybe I would have toyed with them…used my knowledge of them to torment Nyako…force her to come to me. Yes, I would have done all of that…and I would have certainly done much, much more…
…almost like you cut her yourself, huh…maybe we can hold the razor next time, help her to do it right…
She looked at me, her eyes pinning me in place. “Your turn…spill it.”
I wanted to lie…I wanted to come up with a reason that would satisfy her…and keep her safe from my secret…why I did the things that I did…the thing that I had been before, and the thing that I still was…
…if you tell her, she’ll know that you’re insane…no way she’ll keep your secret from your sister…
“I…”
…they’ll have you committed…you’ll never see either of them again outside of a mental hospital…
“I…sometimes have…dark thoughts…” I finally manage to say.
She looked at me and I could tell that she didn’t comprehend. “Like…like wanting to get revenge on Ms. Grey? Like Nyako says…stop her?”
I sat down on the closed commode. “No…darker.”
She placed her hand on my shoulder. “Like…like hurting people? Really hurting people?”
I sighed, “The pain…the cutting…acting out…it makes it easier deal.”
“Oni…this…this is something serious.” The worry on her face was evident. “You could hurt someone.”
“I’m dealing with it Song…I’ve been dealing with it the best way that I can.” I answered. “A few weeks ago…I took a cab to a bad neighborhood…and then…I exposed myself to abuse.” I sighed, “It made me feel better…I felt in control afterwards.”
“ONI!” the shock on her face was apparent and it ran deep. “You could have been hurt…” she paused with the realization, “…YOU DID GET HURT!”
I sighed, unable to argue with logic. “Yes…that time I got hurt…but the important thing was that no one else got hurt…well, no one of any consequence anyway.” My thoughts drifted back to the mysterious man who had been following me and had stepped in to save me from the violation that I had craved at that moment.
SoLo stared up at the ceiling. “This is insane…we need to do something…we need to tell Ny, we…”
There is where I drew the line. “NO! Nyako cannot know about this…none of it!”
She looked at me, almost pleading with her eyes. “I don’t understand…she’s your sister! Why don’t you tell her so she can help you?!”
“Look…my sister isn’t big on subtle…if you haven’t noticed. Just look at the situation with you and Grey. Her solution is to just hit it with a hammer until its dead.” Sure, the symbolism was a bit harsh and over the top, but she’d understand and get the point. “I want to do that…and I want to do much more…but I can’t allow myself to go down that road…I might never come back again!” I shook my head, speaking in earnest. “I love Nyako, but this is heavy and she has enough on her plate right now. She’s worried about you and Grey…she’s the number one contender to the Marquee Title and this weekend…this tag team match is serious to her…especially another chance to lay hands on The Doc.”
SoLo added, “Because of the way their first match ended.”
I nodded, “I know that it is a small thing, but her honor is important to her. With everything else that’s going on, I have no intention of telling her this. She’ll drop everything to help me…but I couldn’t live with the resentment.”
“But you need help Oni! You have to tell someone!” she pleaded with me.
“I did tell someone…” I looked at her in earnest, “…I told you…my business manager…my friend…my sister.” I saw a whole range of emotions flutter past in an instant; gratitude, bewilderment, and fear. I did what I could to sooth them. “I told you Song…you’re the only one that knows…” I paused to correct myself, “…and probably Uzai.”
As soon as the name left my lips I could see SoLo’s demeanor change. “I don’t like him…he’s creepy. Why does he follow you around like he does anyway?”
I shrugged, “He’s a lost soul…he’s broken inside…like me. He’s attracted to what I was…he likes the dark part of me.”
“He needs to stay the hell away from you!” she said, making her stand known.
“I can’t turn him away Song. If I can change…then maybe I can help him change as well.”
SoLo shivered as she recalled her first encounter with him. “He’s rotten Oni…”
I opened my mouth to defend him, but I closed it and decided to say nothing more on the subject instead. I understood her feelings, Uzai was…different…more so than she knew. Instead, I revisited the main point of contention. “Will you keep my secret?”
The compassion and anguish on her face was almost too much to take. “Oni…I don’t know about this. We have to do something…seek some help for this.”
I stood, placing both my hands on her shoulders. “The ring is my therapy Song. When I’m in there…fighting, I can let go of everything and just fight! It’s the only place where I can just let go of It and not worry about hiding.”
She looked down at my hand, “That didn’t happen in the ring.” She looked me in the eye, “The incident in the alley you told me about…that wasn’t in the ring.” She shook her head, “If I don’t do anything…and you get hurt, or God forbid, hurt someone else, how will I live with myself?”
She had a good point that I could not argue with. I had no response at all, until she added; “What if you got some professional help…just someone that could talk to you about this on a regular basis?”
I removed my hands and stepped back, arching my eyebrow as I did. “Like a shrink…?”
…that’s easy, you’re in the ring with The Doc this weekend; we can just see if she wants to get inside our head while we beat her fucking brains out; I am all in for that…
To be honest, the idea did not sit well with me. I had seen someone in the past, Uzai’s sister. It had only been three sessions, which I had been mandated to do because I had attacked the company’s Commissioner. In the end, I had not been cleared to return to action…but the company overrode her determination, at the urging of that very same Commissioner who had decided that I needed to be taught a lesson in the ring instead of being fired. I know, what was the point? There was none…nor did I ever see the point of doing anything with so-called professionals in that particular field.
“Well?” SoLo asked again.
This snapped me out of my musings, I hadn’t realized that I still had not answered her. I shook my head, “Song…I don’t think I can do that. I mean…Nyako is right here, she’ll want to know what I am doing…I…”
“You’ll have to move out” she said flatly.
I was stunned into silence at the firmness of her response. “Song…I…”
…the little cunt is trying to come between us and our sister…don’t let her do it…toss her ass out that window…
I couldn’t believe that was the case, but it seemed to come out that way. “Nyako…she and I…”
SoLo looked at me gravely, “She is part of the reason that I am saying this! I care about you…but I also care about Ny. You need to have your own space where you can deal with these issues…in private.” She frowned, “I’d be lying if I said that I wasn’t also concerned about Ny’s welfare. I mean…since you won’t tell her, at least she won’t be exposed to…to…anything.” She wrung her hands nervously. “I want to help you Oni…but this is the only way that I am willing to do it, otherwise…Ny has to know.”
…can’t you see that she is just jealous and she wants our sister all to herself; we need to deal with her right now…tell that skinny little bitch that the answer is…
“YES…” I said, perhaps a bit too loudly, ignoring my inner voice as I made the hard choice. I didn’t want to leave Nyako…but she was right. If I wasn’t going to share my secret with my sister, I had no right to expose her to whatever potential danger I might pose. Better that I had my own space…a safe place to retreat to and work through my issues.
SoLo smiled, though I could see there was still sadness in her eyes. She had gotten her sister back and then gotten another, only to find that she was severely broken…perhaps beyond repair. Seeing her face and knowing how she felt grieved me, but I didn’t allow it to show. I was done with tears…it was about getting better. I looked at SoLo, “So…who tells Nyako the good news about getting her place back?”
She threw her arms around me in an attempt to comfort me, but I was beyond all that. I had accepted what she said and the help that was offered. Her solution was the best possible…I could not deny it. I was hurt by the notion that my presence put my sister in danger since she didn’t know my secret, but it had a great deal of merit; whether or not I wanted to admit it. I was being selfish where it concerned my sister. I had to work through those feelings if I ever hoped to function normally…or at least what passed for normal.
This was a change that I needed to make if I hoped to move forward and deal with my problems and make a real change. I liked the person that I was trying to become…I liked the idea of family. These were things that I taken for granted all my life and now they were within my reach. I was going to take a chance and do whatever it took to secure that future for myself…the other part of me be damned…
…she’s making you weak…making us weak; you’ll never be rid of who and what you are…no matter how hard you try or how far you run…
Maybe It was right about that…but it never hurt to try.