Post by Gabriella Camacho on Feb 27, 2016 23:28:06 GMT -5
It was the most intense film study I had ever done. I was watching every single move that Oni made. I got every single match I could on her. Not just in LAW, from all over the world. Anything I could get my hands on. I watched. I studied. I wanted to be sure. I promised myself I would leave no stone unturned before I knew I was ready. Nothing she would do, would surprise me, catch me off guard. Nothing would be out of the ordinary. She would pull no tricks. I would, in addition to being physically ready, I would be mentally ready. The only thing I did outside of my own home, was going to the gym to train. Nothing else mattered. Sometimes, I would even work out, at home, while Oni was wrestling on my television. THAT was my level of dedication to putting an end to her being the LAW champion. No games, no retreat, no mistakes. I would know her every single move. I would know mannerisms, I would no quirks. If it was the way her arms or legs moved, to know what she was going for. I would know her, better than she knew herself.
Army life had made my so anal about these little things. Everything could have been a sign of an attack. It borders on paranoia. But if you prevent something because you’re paying attention, you could save lives. Awareness saves lives. Preparation. Drill. Repetition. Over and over until you get it right. It’s no different than any hobby that anyone picks up. Piano, painting, singing, dancing. Anything hobby, or profession, requires practice and preparation. I was simply keeping up with that, in order to become the best I could be. No one person was going to stop me from being ready.
Every slam, suplex, kick, everything was studied. I took notes, I wrote so much my hand cramped. Sometimes it was chicken scratch. I didn’t even care. I never wanted to miss a moment of these matches. I was not about to miss something important. I watched them over, and over. Even the two matches that we had. I watched. I made sure I didn’t miss a single step she took. I saw the viciousness, the violent streak. I saw the woman who was willing to do anything and everything to keep what she has.
And I have only made her, more angry, desperate, and afraid.
I know what they say about caged animals.
It didn’t matter to me. Not in the slightest. I had her nervous. I was so close to finishing this job. And this Sunday, I would be exactly where I wanted to do. I had trained myself, disciplined myself, and conditioned myself. No, fuck…. RE-Conditioned myself to accomplish this goal. I would be ready for this match, I would be more ready for this, than for any other match…fuck, before or after. I HAD to get this one right. No time for setbacks. None.
I was deep into my film study when the lights were flipped on. I didn’t even hear anyone come in. I almost gave myself whiplash I turned so quick.
“What in the fuck, dude?”
Allie. Always Allie.
“What are you doing?”
“Research”
Allie was not happy with me. She always had a key to my place in case of emergency or something crazy happening. But I don’t even remember if I locked the door at all.
“You haven’t returned any of my calls!”
“Phone’s been off. I turned it off all week. Save for my morning alarm.”
Allie sighed heavily as she plopped herself down on the couch behind me. She was staring at me. I could feel it. She was burning a hole in the back of my head.
“You’re turning into a ghoul. Why the hell are you sitting on the floor in the dark watching TV?”
“I told you. Research.”
“You gotta fucking term paper do or something?”
Allie was trying to bring me out of my zone. I had no time for such things.
“Did you need something Allie? I’m really kind of busy.”
Allie had pulled a bottle of water out of her purse and she was drinking it, and she nearly choked at my flat, blunt response.
“What the fuck is wrong with you? You turn your phone off, sit in the dark and watch wrestling? I am not everyone else Gabs. You don’t get to give me the cold shoulder and shit. You’re gonna talk to me.”
I didn’t want to break focus. I was trying to get Allie to just leave. So that I didn’t lose all I had worked up. But I was really short with her. And she noticed. And now she wasn’t going to leave until I talked to her. I quietly paused the match and turned to her.
“I’m…. I’m sorry.” I began. “I’m just really focused on this match. It’s a freaking major title match. I have to be ready. I waiting practically a whole year to get another shot, at another championship, and now I have one, and I can’t let it just go. I gotta be on this shit. Who knows if I when I’ll get another shot at this!”
Allie could hear my real voice. She stared at me for what seemed like forever. She was reading my face. She was good at that.
“You’re nervous.”
A nervous laugh left me. She was right. She always was when it came to breaking me down.
“I think you’ve wound yourself to tight there Gabs. You need to relax. You’re working too hard on this.”
Allie touched my head like she was my mother. Her face was concern. Because, well… let’s face it. I was being a recluse. A hermit. I was forgetting things and not paying attention to much.
“You need a break”
“I can’t Allie. I have to…”
Allie shook her head and covered my mouth with her hand.
“No. You need a break. You’re going to either get up, and go out with me and do something. Or… go to sleep because you are looking rough right now.”
Allie chuckled once as she uncovered my mouth. She had held it there long enough to make sure I didn’t protest. I shrugged and stood up.
“I’ll figure something out. I just need to finish this ma-“
She cut me off again
“No, finish it later. Right now, you need to get your shit together, and we need to do something.”
I shook my head and smiled. Allie was not going to let me get back to work. There was no way now.
“Fine. Fine… we’ll go out.”
Allie nodded
“You’re damn right we will.” She said pointing her finger at the window showing downtown from my apartment. “Life’s too short to spend cooped up in here, worrying about a match. Let’s live a little!”
“I said we’re going.” I reassured her.
She practically watched me walk into the bedroom and change. I could almost see her through the door, arms folded, tapping her foot like this was a movie. In her way, she was doing what she thought was right, best for me. And, it probably was. There was such a thing as overtraining. And maybe, judging by my own reactions to Allie when she walked in… I did do that. I wasn’t me.
I came out and I hugged her.
“Thanks” I whispered to her.
“Somebody’s gotta keep your ass in check.”
Going out to dinner was a welcome change. I had disregarded my own advice to stop and smell the roses last time. I was so driven and focused, that I was almost inhuman. Her ghoul remark was pretty spot on. I am glad I have friends like Allie to pull me back from the brink when I get close. I love her to death for that.
Dinner was nice. I realized what this was at this point. It was like school. Once you knew you had done everything you could do, you celebrated. Like training school. Do everything, and then, you just take it easy. I think I finally understand now.
After dinner, Allie went home, and I finished watching the match I had been, before she showed up. I had more to watch, but… I was satisfied with what I did. I knew I would be ready at Rising Stars. I quietly boxed up those DVD’s and put them away.
From Gabby’s Blog:
So, here we are. Am I nervous? Fuck yes. I am excited? Even more so. It’s come down to this Sunday. I can finally realize my dream and become the LAW champion. I’ve worked long and hard. I’ve fought my way up my whole life to gain accolades, and accomplishments, but most of all, respect. I don’t know if Oni truly respects me, or sees me as just another bump in the road, but the truth is, I don’t care about what she may, or may not think about me. She has done nothing but disrespect me and tell all of the fans about my shortcomings. And yes. I have shortcomings.
I’ve never denied as much. I’ve fallen off my high horse, but I’m always got back on to continue the ride. I will never say that I was the best, ever since I lost the damn Marquee title, and ever since then, I’ve felt like a Hamster on a wheel. I’ve had to deal constantly, with people like Jenn Drew, Kate Steele, Crystal Hilton, time and time again, you know, I came up short. I didn’t exactly get what I wanted. But this whole “Golden child” nonsense Oni has been spewing is fucking dumb. I never asked for anything in this company. I was never handed a championship match, or opportunity. I had to earn it. I stepped up, into Oni’s face, and I accepted her challenge. Then, through my efforts, I earned a shot at the LAW championship. If Oni wants to play the whole “I didn’t earn it” card, she’s just full of shit. Lucas Dupree could have easily, EASILY said, no. But obviously, he wants competition. This isn’t some scam against Oni. No setup. He didn’t say no, and that’s because I impressed him enough. If you’re going to cry wolf, there was plenty of that shit with Ashley Chase handing out title matches like they were candy to people she liked. I didn’t get that either. No, I had to challenge Oni, and then prove myself against her. I did that, all of my own. And I beat Oni’s ass, all on my own. Just like I will at Rising Stars, and I will take the LAW championship from her.
I am physically, and mentall prepared. I will never be more ready for any fight in my entire life. I know it will be a fight. I’m not stupid. Oni’s obviously a great fighter. But, I’ve been fighting all my life. Fighting for everything I’ve ever got. In wrestling, and in life. I’ve been a fighter. I’m used to it. I’m used to people doubting me. I’m used to people assuming I don’t have what it takes. And yes, there are matches, and moments in life I wish I could get back and change, but I can’t. Those days are over. Can’t get them back. I have to life with them. Live with my choices, scars and all. I’m sure I’ll have more scars once Rising Stars is over. I know I will. But I’ll live with ‘em. I’ll also live with them, if it gets me the LAW championship.
But really ,this goes beyond a championship. It’s a matter of pride right now. I’m going to prove to Oni, that not only am I a worthy challenger, I am the fight that she doesn’t want. I want this more than Oni, plain and simple. I am willing to scratch and claw, and do everything I can to win that championship. It means that I am the best. To strap that championship, around my waist, and to call myself the champion of LAW… It is nice. It will be nice. But to do it, by putting down the biggest, baddest bully in the yard. That’s what I’m about. I’m about to put her down, and let a new light shine on LAW. Gone are the days of lackluster champions. Gone will be the days of people parading around pretending to be tough. I will be the champion that LAW hasn’t seen, maybe ever. I will have done this, the right way.
I am nervous. I know this is my big chance. I know I can’t blow it. I know exactly what stands in front of me, perhaps the most vicious champion in any company. But I will be DAMNED if I let that stop me. I’ve been in war, and I’ve been scared to death of it. Scared to lose people, and friends that I made. Scared to lose control and have my fight or flight instincts kick in and I lose everything. Afraid to die. I’ve been in pressure packed situations before, and been nervous, and afraid.
But my fear, will guide me. It will guide me into what I need to do. I’ve done all I can do to be ready, and this Sunday I’m putting my plan into action, I will fight Oni with everything in my body. I will do, as they say in football, “leave it all on the field” I will not disappoint myself, my friends, or my fans. I will come through in the biggest match of my life. I have no other choice but to. I will not fail. Not from lack of effort anyway. If Oni retains the LAW championship, it will be because she did something drastic. I have studied her my every move, and I am in the peak of physical condition right now. Everything, right now, is stacking up in my favor. I have the momentum. I have the confidence. And once that bell rings, I will finally be in the zone I need to be.
I’m going to speak directly to Oni. I hope she’s paying attention. I know you. I understand you. I will be at the top of my game. I will beat you Oni. You can take that shit to the bank. I promise you I will fulfill my destiny and become the LAW Champion.
To be the champion, is my dream. My goal.
At the end of the day, it will be…. Mission Accomplished.
Army life had made my so anal about these little things. Everything could have been a sign of an attack. It borders on paranoia. But if you prevent something because you’re paying attention, you could save lives. Awareness saves lives. Preparation. Drill. Repetition. Over and over until you get it right. It’s no different than any hobby that anyone picks up. Piano, painting, singing, dancing. Anything hobby, or profession, requires practice and preparation. I was simply keeping up with that, in order to become the best I could be. No one person was going to stop me from being ready.
Every slam, suplex, kick, everything was studied. I took notes, I wrote so much my hand cramped. Sometimes it was chicken scratch. I didn’t even care. I never wanted to miss a moment of these matches. I was not about to miss something important. I watched them over, and over. Even the two matches that we had. I watched. I made sure I didn’t miss a single step she took. I saw the viciousness, the violent streak. I saw the woman who was willing to do anything and everything to keep what she has.
And I have only made her, more angry, desperate, and afraid.
I know what they say about caged animals.
It didn’t matter to me. Not in the slightest. I had her nervous. I was so close to finishing this job. And this Sunday, I would be exactly where I wanted to do. I had trained myself, disciplined myself, and conditioned myself. No, fuck…. RE-Conditioned myself to accomplish this goal. I would be ready for this match, I would be more ready for this, than for any other match…fuck, before or after. I HAD to get this one right. No time for setbacks. None.
I was deep into my film study when the lights were flipped on. I didn’t even hear anyone come in. I almost gave myself whiplash I turned so quick.
“What in the fuck, dude?”
Allie. Always Allie.
“What are you doing?”
“Research”
Allie was not happy with me. She always had a key to my place in case of emergency or something crazy happening. But I don’t even remember if I locked the door at all.
“You haven’t returned any of my calls!”
“Phone’s been off. I turned it off all week. Save for my morning alarm.”
Allie sighed heavily as she plopped herself down on the couch behind me. She was staring at me. I could feel it. She was burning a hole in the back of my head.
“You’re turning into a ghoul. Why the hell are you sitting on the floor in the dark watching TV?”
“I told you. Research.”
“You gotta fucking term paper do or something?”
Allie was trying to bring me out of my zone. I had no time for such things.
“Did you need something Allie? I’m really kind of busy.”
Allie had pulled a bottle of water out of her purse and she was drinking it, and she nearly choked at my flat, blunt response.
“What the fuck is wrong with you? You turn your phone off, sit in the dark and watch wrestling? I am not everyone else Gabs. You don’t get to give me the cold shoulder and shit. You’re gonna talk to me.”
I didn’t want to break focus. I was trying to get Allie to just leave. So that I didn’t lose all I had worked up. But I was really short with her. And she noticed. And now she wasn’t going to leave until I talked to her. I quietly paused the match and turned to her.
“I’m…. I’m sorry.” I began. “I’m just really focused on this match. It’s a freaking major title match. I have to be ready. I waiting practically a whole year to get another shot, at another championship, and now I have one, and I can’t let it just go. I gotta be on this shit. Who knows if I when I’ll get another shot at this!”
Allie could hear my real voice. She stared at me for what seemed like forever. She was reading my face. She was good at that.
“You’re nervous.”
A nervous laugh left me. She was right. She always was when it came to breaking me down.
“I think you’ve wound yourself to tight there Gabs. You need to relax. You’re working too hard on this.”
Allie touched my head like she was my mother. Her face was concern. Because, well… let’s face it. I was being a recluse. A hermit. I was forgetting things and not paying attention to much.
“You need a break”
“I can’t Allie. I have to…”
Allie shook her head and covered my mouth with her hand.
“No. You need a break. You’re going to either get up, and go out with me and do something. Or… go to sleep because you are looking rough right now.”
Allie chuckled once as she uncovered my mouth. She had held it there long enough to make sure I didn’t protest. I shrugged and stood up.
“I’ll figure something out. I just need to finish this ma-“
She cut me off again
“No, finish it later. Right now, you need to get your shit together, and we need to do something.”
I shook my head and smiled. Allie was not going to let me get back to work. There was no way now.
“Fine. Fine… we’ll go out.”
Allie nodded
“You’re damn right we will.” She said pointing her finger at the window showing downtown from my apartment. “Life’s too short to spend cooped up in here, worrying about a match. Let’s live a little!”
“I said we’re going.” I reassured her.
She practically watched me walk into the bedroom and change. I could almost see her through the door, arms folded, tapping her foot like this was a movie. In her way, she was doing what she thought was right, best for me. And, it probably was. There was such a thing as overtraining. And maybe, judging by my own reactions to Allie when she walked in… I did do that. I wasn’t me.
I came out and I hugged her.
“Thanks” I whispered to her.
“Somebody’s gotta keep your ass in check.”
Going out to dinner was a welcome change. I had disregarded my own advice to stop and smell the roses last time. I was so driven and focused, that I was almost inhuman. Her ghoul remark was pretty spot on. I am glad I have friends like Allie to pull me back from the brink when I get close. I love her to death for that.
Dinner was nice. I realized what this was at this point. It was like school. Once you knew you had done everything you could do, you celebrated. Like training school. Do everything, and then, you just take it easy. I think I finally understand now.
After dinner, Allie went home, and I finished watching the match I had been, before she showed up. I had more to watch, but… I was satisfied with what I did. I knew I would be ready at Rising Stars. I quietly boxed up those DVD’s and put them away.
From Gabby’s Blog:
So, here we are. Am I nervous? Fuck yes. I am excited? Even more so. It’s come down to this Sunday. I can finally realize my dream and become the LAW champion. I’ve worked long and hard. I’ve fought my way up my whole life to gain accolades, and accomplishments, but most of all, respect. I don’t know if Oni truly respects me, or sees me as just another bump in the road, but the truth is, I don’t care about what she may, or may not think about me. She has done nothing but disrespect me and tell all of the fans about my shortcomings. And yes. I have shortcomings.
I’ve never denied as much. I’ve fallen off my high horse, but I’m always got back on to continue the ride. I will never say that I was the best, ever since I lost the damn Marquee title, and ever since then, I’ve felt like a Hamster on a wheel. I’ve had to deal constantly, with people like Jenn Drew, Kate Steele, Crystal Hilton, time and time again, you know, I came up short. I didn’t exactly get what I wanted. But this whole “Golden child” nonsense Oni has been spewing is fucking dumb. I never asked for anything in this company. I was never handed a championship match, or opportunity. I had to earn it. I stepped up, into Oni’s face, and I accepted her challenge. Then, through my efforts, I earned a shot at the LAW championship. If Oni wants to play the whole “I didn’t earn it” card, she’s just full of shit. Lucas Dupree could have easily, EASILY said, no. But obviously, he wants competition. This isn’t some scam against Oni. No setup. He didn’t say no, and that’s because I impressed him enough. If you’re going to cry wolf, there was plenty of that shit with Ashley Chase handing out title matches like they were candy to people she liked. I didn’t get that either. No, I had to challenge Oni, and then prove myself against her. I did that, all of my own. And I beat Oni’s ass, all on my own. Just like I will at Rising Stars, and I will take the LAW championship from her.
I am physically, and mentall prepared. I will never be more ready for any fight in my entire life. I know it will be a fight. I’m not stupid. Oni’s obviously a great fighter. But, I’ve been fighting all my life. Fighting for everything I’ve ever got. In wrestling, and in life. I’ve been a fighter. I’m used to it. I’m used to people doubting me. I’m used to people assuming I don’t have what it takes. And yes, there are matches, and moments in life I wish I could get back and change, but I can’t. Those days are over. Can’t get them back. I have to life with them. Live with my choices, scars and all. I’m sure I’ll have more scars once Rising Stars is over. I know I will. But I’ll live with ‘em. I’ll also live with them, if it gets me the LAW championship.
But really ,this goes beyond a championship. It’s a matter of pride right now. I’m going to prove to Oni, that not only am I a worthy challenger, I am the fight that she doesn’t want. I want this more than Oni, plain and simple. I am willing to scratch and claw, and do everything I can to win that championship. It means that I am the best. To strap that championship, around my waist, and to call myself the champion of LAW… It is nice. It will be nice. But to do it, by putting down the biggest, baddest bully in the yard. That’s what I’m about. I’m about to put her down, and let a new light shine on LAW. Gone are the days of lackluster champions. Gone will be the days of people parading around pretending to be tough. I will be the champion that LAW hasn’t seen, maybe ever. I will have done this, the right way.
I am nervous. I know this is my big chance. I know I can’t blow it. I know exactly what stands in front of me, perhaps the most vicious champion in any company. But I will be DAMNED if I let that stop me. I’ve been in war, and I’ve been scared to death of it. Scared to lose people, and friends that I made. Scared to lose control and have my fight or flight instincts kick in and I lose everything. Afraid to die. I’ve been in pressure packed situations before, and been nervous, and afraid.
But my fear, will guide me. It will guide me into what I need to do. I’ve done all I can do to be ready, and this Sunday I’m putting my plan into action, I will fight Oni with everything in my body. I will do, as they say in football, “leave it all on the field” I will not disappoint myself, my friends, or my fans. I will come through in the biggest match of my life. I have no other choice but to. I will not fail. Not from lack of effort anyway. If Oni retains the LAW championship, it will be because she did something drastic. I have studied her my every move, and I am in the peak of physical condition right now. Everything, right now, is stacking up in my favor. I have the momentum. I have the confidence. And once that bell rings, I will finally be in the zone I need to be.
I’m going to speak directly to Oni. I hope she’s paying attention. I know you. I understand you. I will be at the top of my game. I will beat you Oni. You can take that shit to the bank. I promise you I will fulfill my destiny and become the LAW Champion.
To be the champion, is my dream. My goal.
At the end of the day, it will be…. Mission Accomplished.